Religion jokes
What gun was used to kill Bin Laden?
An AK-BAR 47.
Me: *reading a sign* "Children are a gift from god."
Me: "No, they are a gift from the underworld."
Mother: "Yeah, I picked you up at the gift shop on my way out."
Mother: "You are a spawn of Satan."
Why is the elephant headed God the true God?
Because he doesn't exist!
The existence of the word "priest" implies the existence of "prier" and "pri".
I'm Pastor Moe Mister, Moe Lester.
Memes
What does a nun say when you ask too many questions?
"Nunya business!"
You're so fat, you lasted a whole year on the cross just off of your fat.
What do you call a Muslim bee?
Habibee.
It wasn't Islam that radicalized the terrorists who did 9/11.
Jenga comes to mind, though!
A priest and a rabbi were hanging out at a playground. The priest waves to a kid to come over and tells the rabbi, "Let's screw this kid."
The rabbi looks confused and asks, "Out of what?"
Bruh, frog cult is besttttt!
Your hairline has a huge path between it, looks like Moses had something to do with it.
They don't call priests "daddy," they call me daddy.
The only reason communism started was because God looked at your face.
Did you hear that Rushdie has a new book? It's titled "Buddha, that Fat Fuck."
Why don't churches have Wi-Fi? Because they can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
P.l.a.n.e.
Precious lord, are nonbelievers evil?
To Drew the Devil,
We NEED to talk RN. I'm very mad at you, and we need to talk.
Angry Alex
One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"
That’s why the nickname for your hairline is the Red Sea.