Religion jokes
A priest and a rabbi run out of a burning building.
Priest: What about the children, Rabbi?
Rabbi: Fuck the children!
Priest: Do we have time?
When you go to the priest's basement, you will always find the pope's body and his children in the corner of the room.
Premise 1: IF God exists, he exists.
Premise 2: If God exists, he exists.
Premise 3: IF God exists, he definitely exists.
Conclusion: Therefore he exists.
Meya eats meat all her sins is go off when she eat meat.
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.
so true lol
I took my mother-in-law out yesterday.
God being a sniper is so fun!
Why do orphans go to church so they can call someone "father?"
Hi, my name is Meer Adnan Hussain. I am a Muslim. I live in Karachi, an area of Pakistan. I want this job. I am interested in this work. Please take me in this work. Your porn star, Meer Adnan Hussain. Wait for your email. Okay.
God, when terminally ill children beg him to heal them:
God: No, I don’t want to.
If you look for something for 10 days and a woman walks in, opens a cabinet, and finds it:
So, just hire a female pope for the Holy Grail that has been missing for 500 years so she just opens a cabinet and she finds it.
What’s the difference between God and Hitler?
God made thousands of bread, Hitler made thousands of toast.
Do y'all love Jesus, God? 🙏❤️
What do you call someone who is half a Jew?
Jew-ish.
Why won't an atheist convert to the religion of Islam? Because being on the sex offender list is the only requirement to be a Muslim according to the Arabic religion of Islam.
What is the definition of suspicion? A: A nun doing squats in a cucumber field.
Q: What do priests do to stay in shape?
A: They exorcise.
How do you play chess with a Catholic?
You put a condom on the bishop.
Person: "How many people have you had intercourse with?"
Me: "Nun."
We are coming out with a Whopper that is similar to a priest because it also has its meat between 5-year-old buns.
Why couldn't Jesus have been born in Florida?
Answer: They wouldn't be able to find "Three Wise Men" or a virgin!