Religion jokes
How do you play chess with a Catholic?
You put a condom on the bishop.
God, when terminally ill children beg him to heal them:
God: No, I don’t want to.
My girlfriend who is a Jehovah's Witness had sex with me so hard, she turned to Christianity.
The bird was trying to cross the road because there was a church, but instead, the birds chirp chirp chirp, "Let's go to church!"
Why do orphans go to church so they can call someone "father?"
It says the truth
God took away Stephen Hawking's privileges.
Need an arch? I Noah guy.
Meya eats meat all her sins is go off when she eat meat.
Is it bad to hit an orphan?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Well... I mean, they could go to church and try to gather that someone hit them.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Golly.
Golly who?
Godly leave me alone!
What is the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? You can hang the picture with just one nail.
Why couldn't Jesus have been born in Florida?
Answer: They wouldn't be able to find "Three Wise Men" or a virgin!
Person: "How many people have you had intercourse with?"
Me: "Nun."
Ganesha is an elephant.
What does a child molester and a Catholic priest have in common? They both prey at church.
Why do orphans love church?
They finally have a father.
What did Satin say to God??
"Bitch, what the fuck you looking at?"
I am starting a frog cult now!
A nun going down a water shoot? She never felt so wet in all her life!
Yo mama so fat, she had to get baptized at SeaWorld!