Relationship jokes
Treat me like a joke, and I will leave you like it's funny.
My wife made electric eel for supper. I was shocked!
Bestfriend @3am: I love you.
Me: Love you too.
*wait whatttttttttttttttttttt*
I don't know if this is funny.
Guys, help! I need advice to confess to my crush. I'm being for real right now, guys, help!
Your mom said, "Can you get to the dick game?"
My wife said I had no sense of direction... so I packed my sh*t and left.
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!
Why can't an orphan be gay? It has no one to call daddy.
What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe?
Fur Traders.
I have an exam next week, so I called my ex and asked if she had any cheating tips.
What’s the speed limit in bed?
It’s 68. Once you hit 69, you have to turn back around.
A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend."
The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better."
"Thanks Dad," the son says.
The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to climb Mt. Dew.
What does a mother fear most?
Hearing "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" for 5 different men.
Ever seen the show Naked and Afraid? That’s what I call hide-and-seek with my uncle.
Everyone likes orphans but their parents.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not your dad.
A: Why are you so sad?
B: I was watching porn, and all of a sudden my wife opened the door.
A: Ok, I see, but is that really such a big deal?
B: I mean, she opened the door in the movie!
Are you a tree? Cuz I’m trying to hang with you. ;)
Person 1: “Hey, today was great!”
Person 2: “What happened?”
Person 1: “I ran into my ex today.”
Person 2: “What’s so great about that?”
Person 1: “I was in my car.”