Relationship jokes
What sexual position produces the ugliest kids? Ask your mum!
Two boys were at a lake, and they went to a bush and saw a naked lady.
One ran away, the other one followed the one who ran and asked why he ran. The boy answered, "My mum told me if I saw a naked lady I would turn to stone. I ran away because I felt something get hard."
I was making love to this girl, and she started crying. I said, “Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, “No, I hate myself now.”
– Rodney Dangerfield
What’s the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?
Pikachu, I choose you!
What's the difference between your dad and a boomerang?
The boomerang comes back.
Memes
I think people should date orphans, because their parents are never home.
When somebody says they're depressed (by over-romanticizing their so-called problems) but can't be by your side when you are at your lowest.
Then you know they're faking depression. 🙂
If you know it, you know it.
Are you my fish? Because you're supposed to be dead.
I broke up with my RBLX gf, and I heard my uncle crying in the other room.
Money and women are kind of the same thing for me; it comes and goes very easily.
When Ariana Grande broke up with Pete, she said, "I have one less problem without you."
Do you mix concrete for a living? Because you’re making me hard.
I used to date a girl with a lazy eye. Turns out she was seeing someone else the whole time.
Are you winter? Because you will be coming soon.
Why do orphans hate Dom Toretto?
Because it's all about family!
Why are friends good at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.
Women are like towers, the man wants to bang them both.
What is the difference between a woman and my fridge?
Only one moans when I put my meat in it.
What do the Twin Towers and my ad's condom both have in common?
They both broke and everybody cried.
My wife says sex is even better on holiday. I wish she didn’t tell me via email.