Relationship

Relationship jokes

Poem

    • Well, I don't have a joke but... I have a poem.

    My dick is red, your pussy is blue. I... lied to you.

  • 0

    • Orphan

    • So I had a friend who was an orphan, and he said, "How's your girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have one." He said, "I know, just reminding you." I then said, "Hey, how's your parents?" I never saw him after that.

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    • Ex

    • "Hey, today was great."

    "What happened?"

    "I ran into my ex today."

    "What's so great about that?"

    "I was in my car."

  • 21

    • Adoption

    • Son: Dad, am I adopted?

    Father: What? No! Out of all the kids in the adoption center, do you really think I would pick you?

  • 3
    • Relationship memes

    Drug

    • Did you know that there is a new drug on the market for lesbians who are suffering from depression? It's called Trycoxagain.

    Ex

    • Two friends are talking and one says, "I had a good day today, I ran into my ex." The other guy replies, "How is that good?" The friend says, "I was in my car."

  • 1

    • Sexual Relationship

    • I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging.

    Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.

  • 7

    • Lie

    • A family of three, a dad, a mom, and a 12 year old son are driving in the car when the dad says, “How about we play a little game of two truths and a lie? It’ll be fun.”

    “Ok,” the mom and son reply happily.

    “Let me start,” says the son.

    “Ok, go ahead,” replies the mom.

    “I hate video games, I hate school, and I love junk food,” says the son.

    “Ooh ooh! You do love junk food, you do hate school, and you don’t hate video games.” Says the mom.

    “You’re right!” He replies.

    “I’ll go next,” says the dad. “I love your mom, you’re adopted, and my dad almost died in WWII.”

    “Hmm... Your dad did not almost die in WWII, obviously I’m not adopted, and you do love my mom.” Says the son.

    “The lie isn’t that you’re adopted,” says the dad.

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    • Dad

    • I told my friend yesterday he's literally my dad. He didn't show up for the rest of the year.

  • 2

    • Sex

    • Me and my girlfriend were planning on having sex, but I said me and my little brother share a bunk bed and he’s on the bottom. She said tell him we’re making sandwiches so we came up with a plan. "Tomato" means harder and "cheese" means faster. So we were having sex and she was screaming, "Tomato, tomato, tomato, cheese, cheese, cheese," then my little brother said, "Can y’all stop making sandwiches? You're getting mayonnaise all over my bed."

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