Relationship

Relationship jokes

Relationship memes

Parent

    • Today on a drive, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the people living there if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.

    My parents are the worst.

    Loser

    • What’s the difference between a loser and a paper?

    A girl actually dates the paper.

  • 1

    • Barbie

    • I don’t like to play games, actually. There is one game: It’s Barbie. Of course, I’ll be Ken, and you’ll be the box cum in.

  • 0

    • Sister

    • My friend told me he had a sister. I asked if she was hot, and he said she was 8. That wasn't my question.

  • 26

    • Girlfriend

    • I went home to my girlfriend with milk! She said, "Oh thank you honey!"

    Then I got a call from a girl named Melissa. She called and said, "Steven, where the hell have you been? It's been two weeks and you still haven't come back yet?"

  • 1

    • Abuse

    • My wife said she wanted to leave me. She said it’s because of the abuse, but really, she’s the one abusing herself by drinking alcohol and got poisoning the next day. This shows almost half of the woman’s population is weak both physically and mentally.

  • 3

    • Food

    • Every time I come in the kitchen, my girl is in the kitchen in the damn refrigerator eating all the food, like the fried chicken, the mashed potatoes, the collard greens, mac and cheese, and the cornbread.

    Then I said I wanna eat some of that shit. I love soul food. Then I told her, "You keep it up; your fat ass is going to be big like the house on Haunted Hill."

  • 1

    • Orphanage

    • School Bully: How's your girlfriend? Oh wait, you don't have any!

    Me: How's your parents? Oh wait, you don't have any! *Continues to burn down orphanage*

  • 0

    • Banana

    • What did the banana say to the vibrator?

    "Why are you shaking? She’s gonna eat me!"

  • 2

    • Song

    • I can't help myself I put it down on paper All the different stages, memories of us That's the only way I know that I can shake it Writing all our pages, every single thought I know you don't like when I'm nostalgic No, you've never tried to understand Say you're doing fine, don't think about it Like I do.

    Sorry for writing all the songs about you I know that you hate that I got more to say Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to Swear no one will know that every moment was true All the mistakes and why I ran away Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to

    I can't wait for you to recognize the stories Like when you said i was beautiful Will you act as if you haven't even heard it? Nothing of it really matters 'Cause I know you don't like when I'm nostalgic Go back to the start to get an end Say you're doing fine, don't think about it Like I do.

    Sorry for writing all the songs about you I know that you hate that I got more to say Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to Swear no one will know that every moment was true All the mistakes and why I ran away Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to

    Just to get over what we lost, what we lost I put it in words to clear my thoughts And just to get over, over us I had to, I had to

    Sorry for writing all the songs about you I know that you hate that I got more to say Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to Swear no one will know that every moment was true All the mistakes and why I ran away Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to

    sorry kenny?!

    Time

    • Wanna know something funny? Well, there was this one time when my parents were talking about their marriage.

    Then after the wedding, they decided to make a joke, and then 9 months later, I was born. My birthday (4/1/06) April 1, 2006.