Relationship jokes

They say the polar ice caps are melting, good, because my wife's a fat, cold bitch.

Cancer is like your dad. It only comes back when Blueface baby drops a new album.

I went fishing while watching porn, and my girlfriend said, "Well, you want my fish?" and I said, "But you're not in the water."

Your so fat, my sister said. I said, "So at least I ain't fatter than your momma."

Friend: Wanna hear a joke?

Orphan Friend: Sure.

Friend: Parents.

Other: I don't get it.

Friend: And you never will.

Why can't an orphan have sex?

They have no one to call "daddy."

You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.

Why does an orphan cry when we say "ur mom?"

Because they have no mom.

Hey Gwen, uhhhhhhh, fresfry told me to tell you I like you. Jk, I don't.

Gwen pegs Xavier.

My boyfriend's sister is mad because I smashed his girl.

"Roses are red, I'm a girl, Now go and take a hike."

Women, you're a marshmallow because you're white, squashy, and everyone sticks their stick inside you.

What do women and dog turds have in common?

The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.

Dmitriy has no mother.

My wife and I went to the bar to get a drink, but 2 mins later, I see her dead on the ground. I guess she couldn't see the bottle flying at her face. Then I laughed and went home.

Are you winter? Because you will be coming soon.

Me: Sister, are you wearing makeup?

My sister wearing all the world's makeup.

Sister: Just a little.

Know why they call gonorrhea gonorrhea?

'Cause once you have it, everyone is gone.

*Son comes out as gay*

Me: What's 17 more years?