Relationship jokes

The way ladies cheat nowadays is very alarming.

She might give birth to twins, but each twin having a different father. 😭

You only put your user name under Daddyboy_01 because your dad left you, hahahah!

I was at the park the other day and sat down on the bench next to a mum and her daughter, and she asked which one was my kid, and I said I haven't decided yet.

What did the gay necrophiliac say when his relationship ended?

"That rotten asshole split on me again!"

What kind of food does a lesbian love? Anything they can eat out.

My mom loves balls.

But my dad has been gone for the last 4 years.

What do girls and your hairline have in common? They are both receding.

Jack & Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy...but Jack got a shock and a mouth full of c0ck cuz Jill's real name was Randy.

Her name was Lola.

She was a loner.

At the Copa.

Then I saw her,

And I got a boner.

The next morning,

She couldn't remember if I banged her.

At weddings my mom always tells me I’m next. So I say the same to her, at funerals.

How does a hillbilly mother know when her daughter is on her period? Her son’s dick tastes like blood.

Her Name was Lola. She was a loner. At the Copa I saw her And I just wanted to bone her!

What’s the best thing about a blowjob?

The silence.

There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.

Me: You have pretty eyes.

Her: Thank you.

Me: I can make them roll back 😈🥴

What do you call an orphan taking a picture of themself?

A family photo.

I love Mekhi!

It turns into ligma.

Brother: What's ligma?

Big Brother: Ligma dick!

My emo friend got jealous when my phone died.

What’s the difference between a mistake and an orphan?

At least the mistake was loved.