Relationship jokes
Johnny, Johnny?
Yes, Papa?
Do you love me?
No, Papa.
#### you!
A man and a boy were walking through a dark forest. The boy said, “I’m scared.” The man said, “Why are you scared? I’m the one who’s going to leave these woods alone.”
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high, grabbed Jill's thigh, and said, "I know you wanna."
Jill said yes, lifted up her dress, and then they had some fun, but silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
Your mum said, "Who did it?" Ya nan!
Why do orphans hate p*rn hub?
They always see a stepdad and stepsis.
My wife accused me of being immature, so I kicked her out of my "boys fort."
Comment on this if you are somewhat like me: depressed, single, gay, and act like you're not burning inside.
Yo mama slept with so many guys she's starting to look like one.
Kid: My parents want to meet you, you wanna come over?
Orphan: Na, I'm good. I'm going to watch Home Alone. It's the only movie that I can think of that's related to me.
Yo mama!
Bad handjobs are rare. They’re hard to come by.
My dumb ass thinking I made a friend, oh ya, I forgot, literally nobody likes me!
Hey daddy *winky face*
I painted my dad white so he wouldn’t leave.
What does "bitch" mean?
Son asked father, father said it means "you're handsome." Son said, "OK, you're a bitch." Father: "Of course not, I'm not a bitch!"
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
He wiped his ass.
A man was taking a child into a dark forest.
The child said, "I'm scared!"
The man replied, "Well I have to walk home alone."
I’m on top of things. Would you like to be one of them?
Are you a red light? Because I stop every time I see you.
What do you call a sexually attracted pizza who spoons another pizza?
A Topping.