Relationship jokes
My d*ck is hard, what's your name?
Two husbands walk into a bar.
The first one says, "My wife is an angel."
The second one says, "You're lucky, mine is still alive."
What did the cell say when it was dividing?
"It's not you, it's me."
Your mom is a mom!
My wife was run over.
What do you call skeletons having sex?
When the relationship is dead, but you're still fucking.
Wife: Honey, I love you.
Husband: I love you all.
Wife: Awww.......... Wait WHAT?!?!??!
You and your mom.
My dad called me as I said I shit in my sister's mouth. Impossible? Nope.
What do you say after committing incest?
No Chromo!
Why did Karen leave me?
Because I was a mushroom.
Why was the chicken black and the other were white? Adoption!
Closer kin, deeper in!
I was in Alabama last year. I walked into a store and noticed a couple kissing each other, and I said, "Excuse me, where is the bathroom?" and the man said, "Right over there." I went into the bathroom and then heard the girl say, "Dad, I have to go to school soon!"
The QUEEN is JACK! KING off the JOKER!
I know what you're thinking, pervert. Actually, the joke's about a jester in drag. OK, I’m joking, the Queen cheated on the King with the Jester.
The QUEEN is JACK! KING off the JOKER!
I know what you're thinking, pervert. Actually, the joke's about a jester in drag.
OK, I'm joking, the Queen cheated on the King with the Jester.
Babe, it's over.
After all I've done for you? Wow! I cheated on you with your sister anyway.
I meant the movie...
Daughter: Dad, why did Mom do best?
Dad: Nothing, except pretend to love us and leave.
Daughter: So she only loves my sister?
Dad: Yep.
His boss gave him some projects to work on, but he failed at it.
His boss told him: "You suck."
And he started sucking his boss, after he was done.
His boss told him: "You suck for life!"
XD
Today was a bad day. First, my ex got hit by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver.