Reject jokes

My heart says to stop because it hurts.

Bro, chill. It's really not that deep.

So a woman walked into a bar. There was a man. She went up to him and said, "You're cute." He said, "Yeah, and you don't deserve equal rights."

I got rejected from art school today, so yeah.

I tried to adopt an orphan. The card got declined harder than the child did.

One day, Johnny told his dad that a girl in his class liked him. He thought she was cute. She said, "Aw, you're like candy!" He didn't say anything. He said, "Why don't you think I am sweet like candy?" Little Johnny said, "Well, sometimes I get a toothache, and it hurts, so I stop eating it, like I stopped liking you."

Yo mama is so ugly, when she tried to join an ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals!"

In preschool, I confessed my love to my crush, and she rejected me. As heartbroken as I was, I sucked it up and went back to teaching.

Dad and Mom: -takes one look at Child-

Dad and Mom: "We don't want him."

Orphan: And I took that, personally.

Kid: "I fucked your mom."

Orphan: "What's a mom?"

When I ask my dad if I got adopted, he said, "Not yet, no one wants you."

I tried to get into an emo bar, but I didn't make the cut.

Imagine you ask a girl out in braille.

And she leaves you on felt.

The time I saw you and you asked me to be your friend.

Me: "Yeah... no. You're too ugly. Even your parents never loved you."

Kid: 😭

When you ask for plastic surgery, they said, "We could not fix you, but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face."

Man: Can you be my girlfriend?

Woman: I'm lesbian, sorry.

Man: Oh, here's your rope.

Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.

Child: But why?

Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.

Orphan: But why?

I asked my girlfriend if we could try my rape fantasy last night. She said no. It was the best night of my life.

I confessed to my crush in preschool. Unfortunately, she rejected me. I just carried on and got right back to teaching.

Yo momma is so ugly, she gets rejected by dead people.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be single than be with someone like you.