Fantasy

Fantasy Jokes

Girlfriend

I asked my girlfriend if we could try my rape fantasy last night. She said no. It was the best night of my life.

Batman

Kid: "I wish I could be like Batman!"

Genie: "Wish granted!"

When the kid gets home, both of his parents are dead.

Witch

Why don't witches wear underwear?

So they can get a better grip on their broom.

Midget

Friend says, "You were so drunk last night, you threw a mushroom at a midget and said, 'Grow, Mario, grow.'"

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  • Magic

    Them: You want some Lucky Harms?

    Me: What are Lucky Harms?

    Them: They're Lucky Charms, but instead of being magically delicious, they're magically malicious.

    Ocean

    I had a dream about the whole ocean being filled with orange soda.

    Turns out it was a Fanta sea.

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  • Song

    Guess what song this is from:

    "I'll cut you into little bitty pieces,

    Or freeze you till your blood runs cold,

    Or stab your till' you heart stops pumping.

    I'm here to realize your wish from what I'm told."

    Mass Murder

    Don't you just want to go on a mass murder while listening to goodbye Moonman? Oh, just me... OK.

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  • Witch

    Why don’t witches wear underwear?

    To get a better grip on their broom.

    Mermaid

    A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd-shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders.

    As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"

    Vampire

    What did the lesbian vampire say to the heterosexual woman after the lesbian vampire was done licking the pussy of the heterosexual woman?

    "When is your next blood period?"

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  • Woman

    Why did the woman want a boyfriend at least 2 🦶 taller?

    So she could feel like a little girl and fulfill her rape fantasy.

    Demon Slayer

    My teacher: If you could go anywhere, where would you go?

    Me: Demon Slayer.

    My teacher: Why?

    The quiet kid: TO GET EATEN BY A DEMON OR BECOME ONE!!!