Red jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue. Don't touch the beds, they are sticky with white goo.
Q: What's black and white and red all over?
A: The U.S. in 1919!
Roses are red, violets are blue, feminist pussy stinks, and yours does too.
What is a redneck's favorite sock?
A red sock.
Sususususususu su usus u sussu susu susus us ususususus sususus red sussy amogus susususususus.
Memes
What's red and runs up your leg?
A homesick abortion.
What’s red and cries?
A skinned baby in a bag of salt.
Roses are red,
My nuts are bigger than your small balls, that's why I get all the bitches.
Roses are red, violets are blue, You'll suck my dick 'cause I'm stronger than you.
What do you call a baby with red curry fried hair?
A baby using a potato peeler and a comb.
Mom, what happens if you swear at a church?
Well, honey, a tee posing nun with glowing red eyes and nunchucks will beat you.
What do you call a baby with red on it?
A baby in a microwave.
If Red gets voted out, what happened?
Red is not voted out, Red is a hacker, so he kills Blue. OK, so someone found Blue's body. Red said, "Where?"
Lime, Green, and Purple said, "How is Red not dead?"
Red: "I am a hacker, you noobs!"
Lime, Green, and Purple run.
Red killed them all. Red is the win, but he is not the win.
Black killed Red. Black is the win.
LOL
What is 6" long, bright red, and your wife cries when you feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
A blond, a brunette, and a redhead walked into a bar. The bartender told them there was a magic mirror in the bathroom. He said that if you spoke the truth in front of the mirror, you would have your greatest desires, but if you told a lie, you would disappear.
The redhead said that she was the prettiest girl in the bar, and she walked out of the bathroom, and she got a thousand dollars. The brunette walked in and said she was the smartest one in the bar. She walked out of the bar with a new car. The blonde went in, she said, "I think..." poof, she was gone.
What’s red, nine inches long, and makes my girlfriend cry every time she sees it?
Her abortion.
Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, brown, and yellow?
So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.
What's red, green, and slimy and slides down the chip shop window?
Abortion of chips.
How could the German people fall for Hitler and the Nazis?
There were an awful lot of red flags!
Roses are red, My friend is choking. That stupid bitch shouldn't have eaten my muffin.