What’s black, white, and red? A nun that fell down a 100 flight of stairs. What’s black, white, and laughing? The nun that pushed her!

what turns red, blue then white? the last person that I’d strangle

Roses are red,my name is Dan,I have a gun,GET IN THE VAN!

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a ravishing blonde and an old lady are sharing a compartment on a train as it winds its way through the Alps. Every now and then the train passes through a tunnel, during which time the compartment is plunged into complete darkness. On one such occasion, a ringing slap is heard and as the train passes back into daylight, the Frenchman is rubbing his sore, red cheek.

The old lady thinks, “I bet that dirty Frenchman fondled the blonde and she struck the pervert.”

The blonde thinks, “I bet that filthy Frenchman was looking to grope me in the dark, mistook the old lady for me and she slapped him.”

The Frenchman thinks, “I bet that perfidious Englishman touched up the blonde in the dark and she slapped me by mistake.”

The Englishman thinks, “I can’t wait for another tunnel so I can slap that French twat again.”

Roses are red Violets are blue, I’d get in the van if I where you…

a blond, a red head, and brunette, were stuck on an island, and the closest populated island was 100km away, so in turn they try to swim to the island, the brunette swims 10 km then drowns, the red head swims 30 km then drowns, the blond swims 50 km then gets tired so she swims back.

A Blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.

The Blonde Cop asked to see the blonde driver’s license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.

‘What does it look like?’ she finally asked. The policewoman replied, ‘It’s square and it has you picture on it.’

The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. ‘Here it is,’ she said.

The Blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, “OK, you can go. I didn’t realize you were a cop…”

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a gun Get in the van

What’s red and in a corner ? A baby with a razor blade What’s green and in a corner ? The same baby three weeks later

What’s red and bad for your teeth? – A brick.

Roses are red, I dont know why, Living is hard, I want to die.

What’s black and white and red all over? A massacre at a funeral.

the doctor says to the woman there was good and bad news. the woman says she wants the bad news first the doctor says the bad news is the baby had red hair. then he said the good news is it is dead.

what is red, green, lies in a ditch and is covered in cookie crumbs?

…a girl scout that got hit by a car

Why does the nurse need a red pen?

In case she has to draw blood

Whats black, white, and red all over? A nun that fell down the stairs. What’s black, white, and laughing? The nun that pushed her.

Whats red, 6 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I feed it to her ?

Her miscarriage

what’s green then red all over and goes 100mph?

a frog in a blender

roses are red, violets are blue, i have five fingers, and the middle one is for u.

What do you call a red neck on fire. A fire cracker

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