Put jokes

I am a racist, and I put my milk before cereal. Well, to be honest, that was when I had milk, but one day my dad says he was going to get some... then he left.

Now when I see a black guy, I yell, "Thanks for picking the cotton to make my shirt!"

Do you know how to confuse Helen Keller?

Put her in a room and tell her to find the corner.

Yo mama so fat!

She sunk the Titanic. She put on a blue coat and they thought she was an iceberg!

You walk into an area that has big asses on the wall, and they feel lifelike, so you put your dick into them, and you go on the opposite side of the wall, and women are naked through the wall.

I heard they're making a film about Jimmy Savile, it's a very touchy subject.

I heard the film about is so boring it puts you to sleep.

Me: Hi Jaiden.

Bully/Jaiden Harper: Leave me alone, weirdo.

Me: Wow, says the one who didn't pass 3rd grade.

Bully/Jaiden Harper: *hits*

Me: *calls FBI and puts on gloves and stabs random person then gives knife to Jaiden and takes off gloves* Bye bye.

FBI: FBI OPEN UP!!!!!!!!!

What did the porg say to the porg?

Hi Porg.

You're on worst jokes ever. You thought I put up a good joke? HAHAHAH!

Mozart doesn't care if Bach is better than him; at least he puts a lot of emotion [into his music and] he makes people happy.

How do you blind an Asian?

Put a windshield in front of them.

Personally, I think putting beans on toast is better than bullets in children.

Why were the Twin Towers mad?

Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza but it came plain.

Why is your hairline so put back it's looking like it was slapped by Will Smith and it needs to be fixed?

What does a kid do when he's bored and he's sitting? He puts wheels on the chair and makes it a wheelchair.

What is war used for? (put in comments below)

I slit my wrist and said, "THAT'S A LOT OF DAMAGE!" So I did it again, but with a knife and said, "NOW *THAT'S* A LOT OF DAMAGE!" I then put watertight Flex Seal on the wound, and it didn't seal.

Your hairline is so long that when I put it on email, it didn't send, which is ETHAN BRIDEWATER.

How do you break an orphan's wall in their room in the orphanage?

Tell them to put a tally on the wall with a pen for every second their parents are missing.

Yo mamma so dumb, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.

Stephen Hawking was a spac. But if you put an E on the end, you get space, and he loved that.

When you don't wear earrings for a long time, the hole can close, and it hurts so much when you want to put it back. 🙄🙄 😁😁😁🤣