Puns
Have you heard about the animal that was made of a human hand?
It's an ARMadillo.
Why did the electron leave the atom?
Because it wanted to be Argon.
What did one poop say to the other poop? What's the matter? You look flushed!
Make like a drum and beat it!
Where did the eye doctor keep all his kittens? On Cat-A-Racks!
Student: Hey! Did you hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Teacher: No?
Student: All I can say about it is, "Well, well, well."
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going to the airport, which one gets there first? The lesbian, duh, they get there "lickety-split."
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
Sans: What is Todoroki's favorite coffee creamer?
Half n' Half hehe.
Papyrus: Sans! He's not even part of our fandom!!!
Sans: Bro don't get so HOT headed about it. Just CHILL.
Sorry not sorry -sans
My eggcellent egg yolks crack everyone up.
If you don't like them, you're just hard boiled.
Why do cats like to sing? They're very mewsical!
My neighbor is in the Guinness World Records.
He has had 44 concussions. He lives very close to me.
A stone’s throw away, in fact.
What animal lies? A lion.
How do you drown a Blonde? You put a scratch and sniff sticker in a pool.
If you want any pictures of cheese for your laptop, I've got enough to Philadelphia.
I am up in the air about becoming a pilot.
Once there was a boat. Its friends said,
"It's time to come back." And the boat said,
"No way. I don't give into pier pressure."
Yesterday I asked my friend, "What is a fish without eyes?"
They replied, "I don’t know."
I said, "Fsh."
What do you call a country with nukes?
Abomination.
How did the skeleton know it was gonna rain?
If you said he felt it in his bones, you're wrong. He watched the weather forecast.