What happens to a nervous nut?
It cracks.
Don’t panic! Stay c-almond collected.
Why do orphans play with other kids on a playground?
So they will sneak into their parents' car to be a brother or sister.
This is not a joke, nor did I come up with it.
If somebody calls you ugly, just hug them and say, "Life must be hard for you since you have visual impairment!"
Went to the doctor, told him I've been having dreams, first about a wigwam, then about a teepee. He said I was too tense.
Isn't having Depersonalization mean that your like the animatronics off of fnaf/five night of freddies (if you don't know what Depersonalization is look it up)
why do orphans become criminals to feel what it is like to be wanted
What do you call it when you see nothing but pants? Brief psychotic disorder!
There were once these two twins. One twin, no matter what happened, was always pissed off, while the other one was always happy.
This baffled scientists, so they ran an experiment on the twins to figure out what was happening. They took the angry one and left him in a room with all of the latest technology and the most expensive toys and left him overnight. When they came back, he was still grumpy. When they asked him why, he said, "None of these are actually mine, and you left me in here all night, so I'm angry!"
His explanation was reasonable, so they ran another experiment on the other kid. This time, they left him overnight in a room that was literally just filled with horse shit. When they came back to check on him the next morning, he was still smiling. When they asked him why, he said, "With all of this horse crap, there has to be a pony in here somewhere!"
Imagine there's a funny joke here... imagined it? Great! Now check yourself into an insane asylum because you're schizophrenic.
Why did the math book go to the psychologist? -- It had too many problems.
Q. What do rape victims miss?
A. Part of their brain
What do you call a sociopath who damages a box of Wheaties? A cereal criminal!
Q. Why did Hitler shoot himself? A. Because his mother taught him to take out the trash.
What sits on the seabed and has anxiety? A nervous wreck.
Did you hear about the woman who couldn't stop collecting magazines? She had issues.
Gwen just wanted to help you with the bullying.
Tip 1. Ignore them; bullies are really just cowards.
Tip 2. Stand up for yourself; it's ok for people to also help you, but you do the same for yourself!
Tip 3. Just let them be; they're just stupid!
Love you-Iariah
Why did the rapper go to therapy?
To work on his FLOW ISSUES.
What do you call a booty that’s always negative?
A pessimist-cheek.
Why did the man become stupid?
Cause he was suicidal, herbivorous. Ja...
