Psychology jokes
What do you call two bears jerking each other off?
Bipolar.
Why did the lil kid cut himself?
Answer: Because he was emo, HAHHHAHAHAHAAHHA!
Will my suicidal thoughts leave me too if I get attached to them?
How do our brains remember that we forgot something, but we can't remember what that thing was?
What side of the sidewalk do crazy people walk on? The psych-o-path.
How do you keep an idiot in suspense?
I'll tell you tomorrow!
Why can't a little girl fly? She doesn't have the proper motivation.
How does a depressed couple say goodbye on the phone?
"No, you hang yourself first..."
I have depression, but I don't know how to show it in feelings.
What do you tell someone who has depression?
Answer: Just hang in there.
Thanks to the voice who keeps telling me to let go,
he is my only motivation for trying again.
I was walking till I saw a kid sitting on the street. I walked over there and said, "Where are your parents?" He cried even more.
Oh, I just love talking to orphans.
My doctor asked my brother if anyone in the family suffers from mental illness.
He replied: "No, we all seem to rather enjoy it!"
Suicide: Turning one's biology into complex organic chemistry.
A knife is like hallucinations, both in your head.
I asked my friend, "Shouldn't we have 6 senses?"
He replied, "What is the 6th sense?"
"Common sense," I shot back while looking at the kid who was going to detention. "Never mind," I said.
What will make a depressed teenager happy?
A cliff.
My two moods are “I can’t believe I get to be a person” and “I can’t believe I have to be a person.”
Some people say I like heights; others say I'm a daredevil.
In reality, I like killing myself.
What's something the same about a depressed kid and a hanger? They both like to hang.