I'd tell a child abuse joke, but I forget the punchline.
Q. What's an emo's favorite type of comedy?
A. Gallows humor.
Some people think jokes about child abuse are funny.
I'm not sure if I think that, but they do seem to hit different.
Why did the suicidal person cross the road? He was waiting for a car.
"Others, Morris, Sal, Sal, Rasuba Marid, Things!"
My son is broken: "I think at home!"
Happiness!
"Oh, you’re still talking? I thought background noise was supposed to fade out after a while. Must be tough waking up every day knowing your personality was a failed experiment."
Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times, and she won’t believe you.
Tell a woman she’s fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life.
My doctor asked my brother if anyone in the family suffers from mental illness.
He replied: "No, we all seem to rather enjoy it!"
What's the difference between sex and mental illness?
Most of Reddit has experienced mental illness.
Q: Why did Hitler shoot himself?
A: Because his mother taught him to take out the trash.
If someone has a hyperfixation with drawing and playing, does that mean they are on the "artism" spectrum?
What is a pedophile's favorite age range?
9-11.
What do orgasms and impulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
Are you a mental hospital? Cause I need to be in you.
Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.
What does broccoli and sex have in common?
If you were forced to have it as a kid, you’re gonna hate it as an adult.
What do you call a booty that’s always negative?
A pessimist-cheek.
Why did the booty break up with the fart?
It was just too much GASLIGHTING.
How do you lift a depressed person up?
No need, they'll find a way to get on the tree somehow.
Why did the booty go to therapy?
It had some DEEP-SEATED issues.
