Daughter: I know this is weird but I feel like that someone is watching me when I am sleeping.
Father: Sorry
what do you call a stalker stalking himself a narcissist
What do you call a mouse that doesn't like being known about- Anonymouse
My sisters ask me "Are you really a virgin?" I say "That's nun of your business"
I heard a neat little trick you can use to have a public pool all to yourself. If you blow a whistle 3 times, everyone will just get out!
My roommate's diary says I have boundary issues.
For all the Harry Potter fans:
A VPN is occlumency for smart devices and our ISP is a legilimens.
you know what I hate about rape? Keeping it a secret.
What is the worst thing your sibling can steal from you? Your virginity
My sister says I’m annoying , or that’s what i read in her diary.
A: Why are you so sad? B: I was watching porn and all of a sudden my wife opened the door.
A: Ok I see, but is that really such a big deal?
B: I mean, she opened the door in the movi
i hate it when ever i bring a girl over my parents don't care but when i bring one of my friends thats a boy there like KeEp ThE DoOr OpEn and im gay
Gwen if ur reading this the link I sent is for u and ur bf to chat and stuff no one shall bother u! Pinky pinky! Btw do U know how I am cause if do then I am related to kenya and my name starts with T? Don't worry just chat with ur boy friend
I was up all night because my neighbors were having sex.
*was actually up all night watching*
Freshfry pls leave me and prince alone! I never ask u too join our chat!
How do you trick a homophobic heterosexual male that is a roman catholic priest into using the glory hole inside the men's restroom at a gay bar? Tell him that it is a confessional booth
One day the mailman came to drop the mail off then he ask if I could use the bathroom. I said yeah the thing is my mom was coming out the shower naked and when she open the door it was me and the mailman. Now when the mailman sees me he says to me we got something in common we both saw your mom naked.
When your teenager asks for personal space and you remind her that she came out of your personal space.
What is the biggest lie ever? I have read and agreed to the terms and conditions.
Does anyone know what's going on with all the creeps that joined and restart your school laptop to get everything unblocked
