Priest jokes
A child molester and a priest walk into a bar. He orders a drink.
Why can't Heaven and Hell ever be one 2nd paradise?
Heaven always has 5-star reviews.
A priest walked in and said to the kids,
"Hey kids, are you ready for your faptism?"
Have you heard of the new sequel to "The Exorcist"?
A woman hires the devil to get a priest out of her son.
A priest walks into a bar, immediately orders the kids' menu.
What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit?
A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face.
There are Three Sons: Journey, Korean, and Little Joe. They were trapped on a floating island, and a priest gave them each one wish.
The first son wished to go back to the ground. The Second Son wished to go back to the ground. The third son was lonely and wished for his two brothers to come back to the floating island.
What turns green, purple, and white? A chameleon.
What is humble, holy, and helps?
An angle...
If we can't say "God" in vain, why does He get to?
What’s the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.
I once put the Bible in the fiction section.
Why are you guys making fun of priests?
Because you have a suga daddy already.
A Catholic school is burning down. One of the priests says, "Save the children, save them!" Another priest says, "F*ck the children, we're gonna die!!" The last priest is like, "Hmmm... do we have time?"
I’m rather relaxed about death.
From quite an early age, I’ve regarded it as part of the deal, the unwritten guarantee that comes with your birth certificate.
A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar.
These two have been great friends for over 20 years...play golf together...and meet every Tuesday at a classy bar for a glass of wine...talk about golf...good wine and spiritual matters. One day while at the bar enjoying a glass of merlot, the Rabbi raises his glass of wine and says to his long time friend.."brother, do you believe Jesus turned water into wine?"...the Priest thinks for a moment and raises his glass of wine and replies..."yes brother, I do believe Jesus turned water into wine...but don't get excited...since Jesus was Jewish, the wine was probably Manischewitz."
Why did the priest want to learn how to play the organ?
He wanted to be able to finger A minor.
What’s the difference between a priest and target?
Nothing, they both have children’s pants half off.
What do a Catholic priest and an Olympic silver medalist have in common? A: They both come in a little behind.
What's the difference between a peanut and a priest?
With a peanut, you have to break the shell open for the nut to come out.