Q: If George Washington was alive today, what would he do?
A: Scratch mercilessly at the coffin walls, while screaming at the top of his lungs!
President Jokes
What is the similarity between Pink Floyd and Donald Trump:
The best thing they did was a wall.
What is Trump's favorite snack?
Cheetos.
(Get it? He looks like a Cheeto!)
What is the difference between Trump and a flying pig? The letter F.
What's Trump's favorite instrument?
A TRUMPet!!!
Why is it that when Donald Trump and Melania make love, she is always on top?
Donald Trump can only F@#k up.
What do you say when Trump is still president during 2020? Magic!
Yo mama is so fat, she sat on a quarter and popped a booger out of George Washington's nose.
What will Donald Trump build in our devices?
A firewall.
What do you get when you cross Donald Trump with Fregley?
Orange juice.
Donald Trump announced he will run for prez today. His hair will on Friday.
JFK did a good job spreading around on his final speech.
Trump's mom.
Donald Trump is YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Trump, must I say more?
Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?
In case he gets a hole in one.
Why are Trump's ties so long?
Because they go all the way to Russia.
The Pentagon is changing the nuclear codes to over 140 characters, ...
so Trump can't tweet it.
Apparently, Monica Lewinsky didn't vote for Hillary Clinton this election. She said the last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth.
Why does Bill Clinton wear boxers? -- To keep his ankles warm.
