President jokes

Donald Trump travels back in time to talk to his 10-year-old self.

When he sees himself, he says, "Do you see me? I am you, but almost 70 years older."

His 10-year-old self asks him, "Am I going to be famous?"

Trump replies, "Oh yeah, I became president of the United States. Not once. Twice!"

10-year-old Donald was shocked. But he became even more shocked when he heard the next sentence from his current self: "And now take off your pants!"

Young man: "Very good money, and how about the name of the stupid young man again?"

Friend: "Dagobert Duck."

Young man: "Ah, I remember. He was the American useless."

Friend: "Ah, you mean Donald Trump?"

Young man: "Yes, just like that! I know exactly how the guy managed to become president. Hahaha!!!"

Fritz Cheng was asked to write three articles on the subject. He went to his grandmother and advised her: "Question: Kill people! I am sorry, Mr. Fritz, I am looking for his brother—what do you suggest?"

Brother: "I'm Superman. I am Superman!"

Fritz remembers entering the room. That's Alfredo's question in front of the TV: "Do you have any advice?"

Fritz tells a story from his school days. "Remember our words?" said Professor Fleck. "An artist? Is that true? Frison, who are you?"

"I am Superman. I'm Superman," he said. "I hope to meet the president."

Steve Jobs would've been a better president than Trump...

But I guess comparing apples to oranges is unfair.

My friend's mom once told me that when Trump was elected president, she said to my friend: "Hey look, an orange became president. We got an orange as a president before a girl as president."

President Chumples memorialised Charlie Kirk by saying, "He had a real shot at being president."

That's not a joke. The fat fuck actually said that after pan face got shot.

The president of the USA is so damn stupid. His mother must have taken Tylenol while she was pregnant with him, or something.

Trump should be grateful for DEI.

How else could a mentally handicapped person be elected President?

I used to think all Americans were racist.

Now I've changed my mind. They DID elect an orange president.

I think we should change Alzheimer’s disease to Joe Biden disease.

Donald Trump is gonna be the best president we have ever had.

What did President Ford say when he met Betty?

"I am Gerald Ford and you’re hot."

What is a government mandate?

When Obama and Biden go out to dinner together.

A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.

And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"

Government Briefing:

Joe Biden had a meeting with the cabinet today...

...He also spoke to the bookcase and argued with the desk.

Do you think John F. Kennedy went for a ride in Dallas just to clear his head because his wife said he was close-minded?

Did you ever think that John F. Kennedy went for a ride in Dallas just to clear his head?

Who were the greenest Presidents in US history? The Bushes.

If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.

Joe Biden would’ve died in the Secret Service tackle. They would have been like, "Get down Mr. Presi-"