Politics jokes

Here via westwingman.net from Veep!

Q: Why didn't the Oak tree win the election?

A: He didn't get the votes he was oaking for, because he was not the popular vote.

There's only one reason our Education Minister is standing by this curriculum.

In her religion, you NEVER pull out.

What is the difference between human rights and the rights of a human being in?

Random guy: Come on, Bin Laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK, I'll leave.

I was in my guitar class and my strings were dead, and then I realized they were more dead than George Bush on November 30, 2018.

A guy walks up to me and says, "I wonder if the hookman is real?"

I reply saying, "Yeah, it's Asa Hutchinson, lol."

Are you a nation leader or an email deleter?

Why doesn't George Washington carry his ID?

Because he knows he can always ask for a quarter.

What do you call Jan[uary] 6th?

White people smearing shit on the walls of the capitol!

The convoy truckers are a joke.

"Nancy be like I sucked my way to the top."

What do you and Joe Biden have in common?

Nobody loves you or him.

What is Donald Trump's hairstyle called?

A comb-over.

Why does the president take so long to deliver each sentence?

He’s just Biden his time.

Yo mama's so fat, she was overthrown by a small militia group, and now she's known as the Republic of Yo Mama.

Why can’t U.S.A or England play chess?

Because the U.S.A has no towers, and England doesn’t have a queen.

My sister is so stupid, she thought LBJ was a blow job.

What comment did the United States Senator Kamla Harris make when one of her 64% blue dog democrat constituents called her incompetent?

"Sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits!"

Joe Biden would’ve died in the Secret Service tackle. They would have been like, "Get down Mr. Presi-"