Politics jokes
What do the initials "MAD" stand for?
Mothers Against Democrats.
How many times was Bin Laden shot?
911 times.
How did Hitler get killed?
With a "NEIN" millimeter.
Nobody:
JFK: :) Hi guys!
JFK's killer: Ayo look at this shit, I just hit a clip.
When you fail art school.
Chump obviously wants to divorce Melania and marry Pootin, lmfao.
Why did America lose the chess match?
They were down 2 towers.
Random guy: Come on, Bin Laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK, I'll leave.
What is the difference between human rights and the rights of a human being in?
Why doesn't George Washington carry his ID?
Because he knows he can always ask for a quarter.
What do you and Joe Biden have in common?
Nobody loves you or him.
"Nancy be like I sucked my way to the top."
What do you call Jan[uary] 6th?
White people smearing shit on the walls of the capitol!
Brazil is a joke.
The UK is a joke. I want to leave ASAP.
Hispanic and Latino people be like, "No more immigrants!" Like, dude, aren't you an immigrant?
The convoy truckers are a joke.
What do you call a blind Nazi?
A Not-See!
My penis is so polite. It stands up so girls can sit down.
*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: "You're doing standup tonight, right?" Noob Joker (you): "Yes, I am!" Owner: "Get onto the stage." Me: *walks up stage* Owner: "This is the standup comedian noobpro." Me: "Hey guys, how about some Donald Trump?" Crowd: *RUNS*