Politics jokes
Francis Pope, Donald Trump, Barack Obama, and a little boy were on a falling airplane. There were 3 parachutes. Donald Trump grabs the first parachute and jumps off the plane saying, “The world needs my leadership!” Barack Obama grabs a parachute and says, “I need to help make choices for our world,” so he jumps off the plane. At this point, the Pope and the little boy are on the plane. The Pope says to the boy, “take the last parachute, I am too old and I’m going to die soon one day.” The little boy says, “actually there are two, you see, Donald Trump took my backpack.”
He jizzes canned cheese.
"History's repeating itself. WWIII is coming, and the second Russia nukes the U.S., they're all getting fucked."
Trump cheated so much he cheated himself out of an election!
What do you get when you cross Donald Trump with Fregley?
Orange juice.
Where does Bin Laden keep his CDs?
In Iraq.
What's the difference between Obama and Trump?
Obama was a president and Trump was a whiny bitch!
Yo momma so fat that she was used as a tank in Putin's war.
If Hillary Clinton and Joe Biden are in a boat and it capsizes, who survives? America.
Talking to a liberal is like trying to explain social media to a 70-year-old.
What is the difference between Hitler and Usain Bolt?
Usain Bolt can finish a race.
Trump got a new jet.
He's probably already licked the windows.
Why did America lose the chess match?
They were down 2 towers.
Fuck Jewkraine!
Hello guys. It's me, Donald fuckin' Trump. Ask me anything in the comments, guys.
Genders are a lot like the Twin Towers.
There used to be two of them, now it's a sensitive subject.
You know why Hitler wouldn’t drink whisky? Because it made him angry.
Why are the UK and the USA bad at playing chess?
Because they lost 2 towers and their queen.
Everything is made in China... except for baby girls.
Drop me in Afghanistan with a cigar, a Kobe jersey, a MAC-10, a Lambo Huracan with a bumper delete, and a Toyota Tacoma with an M249 on the back. Then I'll have Afghanistan as the 51st state by midnight.