Politics jokes
ememe
Hey, America. No towers? :(
How did Hitler get killed?
With a "NEIN" millimeter.
Unfortunately, NASCAR has been canceled.
The woke people heard that it was a human traffic ring.
What comment did the United States Senator Kamla Harris make when one of her 64% blue dog democrat constituents called her incompetent?
"Sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits!"
Joe Biden would’ve died in the Secret Service tackle. They would have been like, "Get down Mr. Presi-"
What do the initials "MAD" stand for?
Mothers Against Democrats.
My sister is so stupid, she thought LBJ was a blow job.
Random guy: Come on, Bin Laden, time is ticking. Get it, ticking. OK, I'll leave.
Why doesn't George Washington carry his ID?
Because he knows he can always ask for a quarter.
He do American feel like Trump is the president, he is stupid like soup.
When I try to call my friend, I can't get through because my name is Lin Kon, and the operator keeps saying, "Yes, Mr. President."
A kid asks Trump:
Kid: "Where are the confidential files?"
Trump: "There they are, bud!"
Why was Trump banned from music class? He kept putting his finger on D minor.
What was Clinton encouraged to get in college? A minor.
If Pete and Chasten Buttigieg had a baby together, it would be a turd covered in semen.
What did the duck say to the pond?
"Fuck Trump."
Why did Iran, ran?
Iran said, "I ran away!"
Donald Trump travels back in time to talk to his 10-year-old self.
When he sees himself, he says, "Do you see me? I am you, but almost 70 years older."
His 10-year-old self asks him, "Am I going to be famous?"
Trump replies, "Oh yeah, I became president of the United States. Not once. Twice!"
10-year-old Donald was shocked. But he became even more shocked when he heard the next sentence from his current self: "And now take off your pants!"
Why is Bill the bad guy?
Monica wanted to suck dick.
What does every arsehole and Tory have in common?
They all produce horrible shit.