Politics jokes

Hey, America. No towers? :(

ememe

Unless Israel wants to become Hell Aviv, it would put itself on a tight leash, delivered specially from Uncle Sam.

Roses are red, Epstein's face turned blue.

Trump's on that list, And there's nothing he can do.

Trump cut funding for Sesame Street.

I think he's jealous that the characters on Sesame Street can count to 10.

Trump should be grateful for DEI.

How else could a mentally handicapped person be elected President?

Palestinians leave without saying goodbye.

Israel says goodbye when the Americans say so.

There hasn’t been 3 months of peace in this country since 2019. Jesus, take the wheel.

What do the initials "MAD" stand for?

Mothers Against Democrats.

Unfortunately, NASCAR has been canceled.

The woke people heard that it was a human traffic ring.

Why did Iran, ran?

Iran said, "I ran away!"

What did the duck say to the pond?

"Fuck Trump."

I can’t remember if I already said this or not. I might have already said this. Also, this is a true story.

So, I’m walking into a store in Amish country, and there’s this guy with a bear trap. Then my mom’s friend says, "This guy’s gonna catch some bears." Then the Amish guy stops, looks around, and whispers, “It’s for democrats.”

When Hitler killed himself, he shot himself twice. The first one was Operation Barbarossa, and the second one was his death.

What's the difference between me and the rest of America?

I love one and hate the other.

Osama bin Laden back from the dead!!! 💣💣💣💥💥💥🔥🔥🔥🌇

Russia is worse than the USSR.

Russia is just a bonerless USSR.

Random person: We are taking away your freedoms to keep you safe.

Hitla: That's exactly what I said.

"Ahoy, Spongebob! I just committed homicide in Syria, and the one-party state is after my fucking ass! Argagagagagaga!"

"Terrorist, that’s a little strong. We call them private militaries."