Politics jokes
Being pro-life.
How many times was Osama bin Laden shot?
911 times.
What's Osama Bin Laden's favorite song currently?
"Under the Sea" by The Little Mermaid!
Bin Laden's relatives died in a plane crash on 8/1. 🤣🤣🤣
In the year 2020, who were the biggest enemies?
Coronavirus and toilet paper.
Why is Bill the bad guy?
Monica wanted to suck dick.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Alexander Boris de Pfeffel had wine and cheese while your loved ones died in the ICU.
Your mom's so fat, she annexed Crimea!
Yo mama so fat, Donald Trump built a wall around her.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Tory shirts step in doodoo.
Roses are red, violets are blue, don't let your kids next to Prince Andrew.
Texas be like, "We vote to freeze ourselves!"
"You're the bomb."
"No, you're the bomb."
A compliment in the US, an argument in the Middle East.
Osama bin Laden back from the dead!!! 💣💣💣💥💥💥🔥🔥🔥🌇
Random person: We are taking away your freedoms to keep you safe.
Hitla: That's exactly what I said.
"Terrorist, that’s a little strong. We call them private militaries."
Russia is worse than the USSR.
Russia is just a bonerless USSR.
"Ahoy, Spongebob! I just committed homicide in Syria, and the one-party state is after my fucking ass! Argagagagagaga!"
What's the difference between me and the rest of America?
I love one and hate the other.
Pro lifers: End abortion!!!
Pro lifers after school shooting: But not this abortion.