1 like = 1 Ukrainian child sent to Russia.
Politics Jokes
Americans: Miles per hour.
Europeans: Bullets per kid...
🪙 🪙 🪙 🪙 🪙 🪙 🪙 🪙 🪙 🪙 🪙 💶 💶 💸 💶 💰 💰 💰 💰 💰 💰💰 👍 👍 👌 👌 😍 😍✌️✌️ 🌭 🍌 🕳
👨 👨 What does the initials GOP stand for?
👬 Gay man On Penis.
Yo mama's ass is so fat it has its own congressman.
No one:
Literally no one:
Abraham Lincoln: *dies*
John Wilkes Booth: *ranks up*
Why do Chinese people like playing Among Us?
It’s the only place they can vote!
What do you call a blind German man?
A Nazi.
Why did Hitler say "nein"? Because he just got raped, bitch!
What will Donald Trump build in our devices?
A firewall.
Why does Trump build a wall?
There’s such a thing as a ladder.
Donald Trump will return to Twitter.
WWG1WGA.
Trump 2024!
What do you get when you cross a Cuban and corrupt dictator, Fidel Castro?
What did the left butt cheek say to the right?
"Trump 2020."
A teacher was teaching her second-grade class about the government, so for homework that one day, she told her students to ask their parents what the government is. When Little Johnny got home that day, he went up to his dad and asked him what the government was. His dad thought for a while and answered, “Look at it this way: I’m the president, your mom is Congress, your maid is the workforce, you are the people and your baby brother is the future.” “I still don’t get it,” responded Little Johnny. “Why don’t you sleep on it then? Maybe you’ll understand it better,” said the dad. “Okay then...good night,” said Little Johnny and went off to bed.
In the middle of the night, Little Johnny was awakened by his baby brother’s crying. He went to his baby brother’s crib and found that his baby brother had taken a crap in his diaper. So Little Johnny went to his parent’s room to get help. When he got to his parent’s bedroom, he looked through the keyhole to check if his parents were asleep. Through the keyhole, he saw his mom loudly snoring, but his dad wasn’t there. So he went to the maid’s room. When he looked through the maid’s room keyhole, he saw his dad having sex with his maid. Little Johnny was surprised, but then he just realized something and thinks aloud, “OH!! Now I understand the government! The President is screwing the workforce, Congress is fast asleep, nobody cares about the people, and the future is full of s**t!”
A pair of souls were floating up to heaven when they passed a pair of eagles.
"Ah, eagles," said the souls. The eagles were too polite to say anything.
I saw a beautiful homeless girl and asked if I could take her out on a date. She politely accepted and enjoyed herself. Soon after, I asked if I could take her home, she smiled and nodded her head. Her smile disappeared when she saw me running away with her cardboard box.
Why did Hitler kill himself? He knew the war was over at the beginning.
So one day, I took a trip to Russia and saw Vladimir Putin walking in the streets without any bodyguards. Seeing as how I looked just like him, we switched places for a few days.
After two days, some officer came up to me and asked if we were going to project блять, and I said yes, and the officer said, "God help us."
So a day later, I heard on the news that every other continent and the moon were destroyed. I then approached the officer and said, "I thought you meant we were having a giant orgy." He said, "We did, and that we were extremely drunk."
What happened when Obama ran for president?
The whole US thought, "Holy hell, it's Osama bin Laden!" Thought he was dead.
