Pilot jokes
Helen Keller was a pilot in 9/11.
I told my friend to fly a plane,
But he threw a ramp off a roof.
What do you call a black man flying a plane?
A pilot, you racist bastard!
The terrorists lost their landing gear and had to make a crash landing into the closest building because religion.
I am up in the air about becoming a pilot.
I would be smiling if I were the pilot
Your forehead is so big, I could land a jet plane on it.
Chuck Norris doesn't fly on airplanes.
Airplanes fly on Chuck Norris.
You are recently injured because of your job as a driving instructor, so you couldn't go on vacation with your friends.
Your friends tell you that they have an Asian pilot.
You realize, "They have a -1% survival rate!"
Why did the plane crash in the ocean? Because the pilot saw steward Undercut!
Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.
Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.
Time flies by, doesn’t it?
But the plane in 9/11 didn’t.
(The plane) we can’t go over it, we can’t go under it. Oh no, we have to go through it.
Why couldn't an eagle do a barrel roll? It's oblivious, it's il-eagle.
My dad died in 9/11... He was the best pilot I know.
Someone ordered pizza on a tower... A plane came.
Stop making 9/11 jokes, guys! My uncle died in that event. He was the best Arabian pilot in the world!
"Hey, look, that plane is getting bigge-"
My dad died in 9/11. He was the best pilot I have ever seen, though.
I wrote a joke on MH370... but I don’t know where it went.
What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?
— Don't ask me. How should I know? I'm just the drone pilot.