Your forehead is so big I could land a jet plane on it.
I am up in the air about becoming a pilot.
Chuck Norris doesn't fly on airplanes.
Airplanes fly on Chuck Norris.
What do you call a black man flying a plane?
A pilot, you racist bastard!
my dad died in 911... he was the best pilot I know
My dad died in 9/11 ,he was the best pilot I have ever seen though.
Why did the plane crash in the ocean? Because the pilot saw steward Undercut!
I wrote a joke on MH370... but I don’t know where it went.
Why couldn't an eagle do a barrel roll? It's oblivious, it's il-eagle.
Someone ordered pizza on a tower... A plane came
( the plane ) we can’t go over it we can’t go under it oh no we have to go through it
Stop making 9/11 jokes, guys! My uncle died in that event. He was the best Arabian pilot in the world!
It's not nice to make 9/11 jokes. My uncle died in 9/11...
He was one of al qaeda's best pilots.
"Hey, look, that plane is getting bigge-"
Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.
Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.
Time flies by, doesn’t it?
But the plane in 9/11 didn’t.
You are recently injured because of your job as a driving instructor, so you couldn't go on vacation with your friends.
Your friends tell you that they have an Asian pilot.
You realize, "They have a -1% survival rate!"
What do you call an LGBTQ+ plane?
A biplane.
Call me Kobe Bryant, cause I'm gonna helicopter out of this one.
A hired gun gets on a private plane to his next contract. Halfway through the trip, he notices the plane rapidly losing altitude. So he opens that back of the plane and starts tossing out everything he doesn't need: grenades, guns, ammo—unless it was bolted down, it went out. He stopped throwing things out when the plane started to regain altitude.
When the plane lands, he sees some kids giggling on the side of the road. "What's so funny?" he asks.
"Daddy farted and the house blew up," said a singed little boy.
