Physics jokes
Yo mama so fat she has her own gravity.
But she so ugly people are repelled by her.
Who is the definition of a natural-born cocksucker?
A bisexual male, a homosexual male, a bisexual female, or a heterosexual female?
A physically disabled heterosexual male.
I wondered as the rock in the sky got bigger and bigger, then it hit the bottom of the Earth, and... "explosion!"
Even if there were no gravity, I would still fall for you...
Why does Stephen Hawking need some screens?
He needs to win those Fortnite tournaments and get to Champions League.
He dead, he alive, but most importantly, he got a new hard drive.
A fat man was checking his weight and sucking in his fat belly. A physicist saw it and said that's not how the law of conservation of mass works.
Plot twist: The fat man jumped on the physicist and proved him wrong. Now the physicist doesn't have mass.
Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?
She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.
What is Hawking's number one song? The Beach Boys: "I Get Around."
Why does Stephen Hawking only do one-liners?
Because he can’t do stand-up.
Why doesn't Newton cut trees in vanilla Minecraft? Because he wants Minecraft to be realistic!
Which falls faster, an apple or an emo kid?
The apple, because the emo kid is hanging.
He died because he rolled too far away from the wall outlet and got unplugged.
What do you call a physically disabled man who is sitting on the toilet inside the handicapped stall inside the men's restroom?
Sex worker.
Why did the man fall off his bike?
Because someone threw a refrigerator at him.
Apparently Steven Hawking was a stand-up kind of guy.
Why did the electron leave the atom?
Because it didn't want to be argon.
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
I have been reading this book about zero gravity. I can’t seem to put it down.
It's weird how Stephen Hawking's last name sounds like "walking and talking," but he could not do either of those!