Physics jokes
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking pass? Because he couldn't pass "I'm not a robot" test.
A leaf and an emo fall from a tree. Which hits the ground first?
The leaf. The rope stopped the emo.
How do you make a trash can leak?
Hit it with an axe until it becomes part of the cosmos!
What did the neutron say to the atom?
"Sandwiches, dude!"
Yo momma so fat that she don't need a backpack. She keeps her things in her Lagrangian points.
Stephen Hawking was one of the best scientists ever. Now he's walking up the steps of he... No, he's not walking up the steps of heaven.
What did Stephen Hawking's wife say to him having sex? "You're wheelie good at this!"
The nearest approximation to a perpetuum mobile would be a Swabian chasing a Scot because of money.
(Swabians are the Scots of Germany regarding finances.)
What is black and sits at the top of the stairs? -- Steven Hawking after a house fire.
Your momma so fat when she jumped the world collapsed.
What would Stephen Hawking do to get drunk?
Overcharge himself.
I read a book on anti-gravity...
It was impossible to put down.
Stephen Hawking walks into a b... nevermind.
How many apps did he download?
Well, he did run out of storage.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite type of music?
Rock and Roll.
Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven?
He couldn’t climb the stairway.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Steven.
Can't you read? It says, "No Hawking."
Zaine Davis and Stephen Hawking fuck each others brains out.
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with a bull? They both charge.
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house? No, he hasn't either.