Personal jokes
Okay, so I know this is not a joke, but I wanted to take some time to say if you have autism, you are still amazing. You are lovely in every way, and if people bully you, don't listen because they are wrong. You are cute, and I know how it feels. I have ADHD, and I get bullied a lot, but I don't let that get to me because I know what they are saying is wrong and not true. People with autism, stay strong; you got this. I will be your friend by heart, even if it's not in person.
What’s something you can say about a fat person, but not about strippers?
Those legs sure hold a lot of weight.
I got mad at my white friend today. I, as a darker person, had told them to meet me outside at 3 o'clock. They, being VERY special that day, had said, "AM or PM?"
Laughing at their question, I said, "Honey, 3 AM, because I'll lose a fight at 3 PM."
What do you call a disabled person that has no legs and likes being alone?
Leaving, walking.
Why did the straight white caucasian male cross the road?
Because a black person was approaching.
What does a physicist call it when a suicidal person is high up? Potential energy.
What's the difference between a normal person's funeral and a person with polio?
The pose!
What word starts with n and ends with r and you wouldn’t wanna call a Black person?
You really thought n****r, didn't you?
"What do you call a person who is afraid of Santa Claus?"
"Claustrophobic!"
Person with no arms: Even though I have no arms, I can do anything you guys can.
Me: If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏 If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏
Person with no arms: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
What do you call an autistic person playing a guitar?
Guarded.
Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.
What do you call a gay person on fire?
LGBBQ
If you hit an Indian person on the forehead with a dart, is it considered a bullseye?
What war did the black community win?
The Obama era. Only to lose to a smarter white person.
I’m always the first person in line at school for lunch.
I just cut everyone.
What do me and a blind person have in common after I look at Alfie's mum?
We're both blind.
One day my kid with no arms came up to me and said, "Mom, what's dark humor?" I thought about it, then said, "Go wave to that blind person." He just looked at me, confused, but angry.
Me: Knock, knock.
Another person (OP): OP: Who's there? Me: Hatch. OP: Hatch who? Me: Bless you =) OP: But I didn't sneeze. Me: You just don't get a joke, do you?
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*