Personal jokes
When you want Pringles, but a fat person was eating them, there were only three left, sweety.
One person said you are much more beautiful than Cinderella. The next day, you're in court and Cinderella is the witness.
(P.S. she was born to be a drama queen.)
What do you call a person that is both Black and Hispanic and was born on Wednesday? Miérkoolaids.
When an American goes on a scale, the other person will say, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number!"
Ever noticed that "lol" looks like a person drowning?
What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?
"Happynese" (happy knees).
Another joke, I know they suck.
What is a depressed person's favorite joke? Their life.
When a person in a wheelchair says, "You've never taken a step in my shoes," and you say, "To be honest, you haven't either."
Tell the person next to you to spell "me." When they do, say, "You forgot the D." They should respond with, "There is no D in ME." You say, "Not yet." If this does not go as planned, well, then you are fucked for life.
I'm such a good babysitter because the last person I babysat was so flat.
Who is the blindest person in the world?
A cop pulls me over and asks if I have been drinking.
I'm an honest person and say yes, I did, so I take off my sunglasses and tell him that I now had 2 glasses less.
Q: How do you punish a blind person?
A: Give them a gun and tell them it's a hairdryer.
What's a smart person's favorite candy? Nerds! :D
Why can't an emo person be in charge of sky diving?
He won't deploy the parachute.
What do you call a deaf person?
Whatever you want!
When a deaf person is on trial, is it really considered a hearing?
When I throw a dodge ball at a person taller than me, it's always a nut shot.
I was wearing a George Floyd t-shirt, and a person said to me: "That must be a bit tight round the neck."
You: OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE ALL THE KRAP THEY HAVE BEEN THROUGH!
The other person: Who?
You aka answer: Your Butt cheeks.