Person jokes
Donald Trump is to white Americans as O.J. Simpson is to black Americans. They will never choose to convict these people even if they murdered or raped.
I got told I'm too mean and that I need to think before I speak. So now I take a couple minutes and think of what will REALLY piss the other person off.
An old woman walks into an outdoor supplies store.
"I'd like an infrared gorilla," she says.
The clerk proceeds to give her an infrared gorilla from the back room.
"We've had hundreds of these things in the back for ages," exclaims the clerk. "You're the first person who's actually wanted one."
How do you tell an Indian person from a Muslim?
Are you 7/11 or 9/11?
Fat people are like the Twin Towers. Once they go down, they don’t come back up.
What do you say to an upset Down syndrome person?
I'd ask what's up, but it's definitely not you!
How do you tell an Indian person from a Muslim?
Are you 7/11 or 9/11?
I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.
Why are people born in December, January, and February easy to get along with?
They're cool and chill.
What do Spider-Man and suicidal people have in common?
They both hang.
What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? “If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.”
What do sharks and people have in common? The great ones are white.
How did the person feel when his partner wouldn't perform a golden shower on him? Pissed off.
What's the difference between a normal person's funeral and a person with polio?
The pose!
What does a physicist call it when a suicidal person is high up? Potential energy.
Why did the straight white caucasian male cross the road?
Because a black person was approaching.
How do you find a black person in the dark without a flashlight?
Tell them a joke to make them smile.
What do you call a white person from Africa?
Albino.
Somebody told me that black slang is just white slang in reverse. For example:
White person: Dad, you're home!
Black person: Dad?
White person: You can keep the change.
Black person: Empty the register.
She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.
I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.