People jokes
Did you hear on the news that a midget psychic broke out of jail?
There is a small medium at large.
When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.
When a white person says the n word,
black people: "Y'all mother fu...rs ain't gonna believe dis shit."
Age is just a number.
Police are just people.
Jail is just a room.
What do you call a butt that kills people?
An ASSassin :)
They didn't have a category for Bald, so I chose the Bald Eagle.
Did you know that bald people have an endless forehead?
Why can’t Asian people play baseball?
Why?
'Cause they ate the bat!
Three Europeans head to an island. They are captured by the island people. They are going to kill them, and they plead. They grant them a chance to live. The island people tell them to grab a fruit from the tribe's garden and bring it back, then to follow the task at hand.
The first guy brings back a peach. The island leader says, "Stick it up your ass. If you laugh, you die." The first guy shoves it up his ass and laughs, so they kill him. The second guy brings a grape, he does the same and laughs, making them kill him.
The first two are in heaven together. "Peaches are fuzzy, so I laughed. How the hell did you die? You had a grape!" says the first guy. The second guy replied, "It didn't tickle at all. I laughed at the sight [of] the third guy was bringing over a pineapple."
They say there is power in numbers.
Tell that to the people in the Twin Towers.
If you think no one cares about you, stop paying your taxes.
Me: Have you seen a Mr. Weewoo?
Most people: No.
Me: He drives the ambulance downstairs.
What's the difference between an orphanage and a supermarket?
People actually want stuff in a supermarket.
2001, Angry Birds was so amazing. Over 500 people in 2 birds.
What do you call basketball for disabled people?
Rocket League?
What is something in common with gay people and ambulance trucks?
They both take it out the back and go "woo woo!"
"Go big or go home," that’s what some people say.
"Go loud and proud," that’s what other people say.
"Go out with a big, loud bang!" that’s what I say.
What do a gynecologist and deaf people have in common? They both read lips.
How do you catch a polar bear?
Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.
Robert doesn’t see people, the man just sees meals.
Donald Trump and the Pope were standing on a platform in front of a crowd of people. The Pope said to Donald Trump, “I can make everyone in this audience happy with one small swipe of my hand.”
Donald Trump replies, “That’s not possible. You’ll have to show me.” Then the Pope slaps him.