People jokes

Age is just a number.

Police are just people.

Jail is just a room.

What do you call a butt that kills people?

An ASSassin :)

Why can’t Asian people play baseball?

Why?

'Cause they ate the bat!

They didn't have a category for Bald, so I chose the Bald Eagle.

Did you know that bald people have an endless forehead?

Three Europeans head to an island. They are captured by the island people. They are going to kill them, and they plead. They grant them a chance to live. The island people tell them to grab a fruit from the tribe's garden and bring it back, then to follow the task at hand.

The first guy brings back a peach. The island leader says, "Stick it up your ass. If you laugh, you die." The first guy shoves it up his ass and laughs, so they kill him. The second guy brings a grape, he does the same and laughs, making them kill him.

The first two are in heaven together. "Peaches are fuzzy, so I laughed. How the hell did you die? You had a grape!" says the first guy. The second guy replied, "It didn't tickle at all. I laughed at the sight [of] the third guy was bringing over a pineapple."

What's the difference between an orphanage and a supermarket?

People actually want stuff in a supermarket.

"Go big or go home," that’s what some people say.

"Go loud and proud," that’s what other people say.

"Go out with a big, loud bang!" that’s what I say.

What do you call basketball for disabled people?

Rocket League?

2001, Angry Birds was so amazing. Over 500 people in 2 birds.

What do a gynecologist and deaf people have in common? They both read lips.

What is something in common with gay people and ambulance trucks?

They both take it out the back and go "woo woo!"

They say there is power in numbers.

Tell that to the people in the Twin Towers.

Me: Have you seen a Mr. Weewoo?

Most people: No.

Me: He drives the ambulance downstairs.

If you think no one cares about you, stop paying your taxes.

Robert doesn’t see people, the man just sees meals.

How do you catch a polar bear?

Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.

People in 1 Ad: I bet we will have the best technology ever in 2023.

2023: GO BACK NOW! THERE'S 50 THOUSAND GENDERS, DUMB GEN Z, TIK TOK, WE NEED JESUS!

As I grow older, I remember all the people I lost along the way. Maybe tour guide wasn't the right career choice for me...

Why do disabled people always get picked on?

Because they can’t stand up for themselves.

Q: Why is Japan the healthiest country?

A: Last time they had a fat man, 80,000 people died.