People jokes
How do people in Alabama get circumcised? You knee your sister's jaw...
One thing about disabled people is they never set foot in prison.
The cycle of Pionel Pessi:
- Ghosting👻
- Diving🐬
- Complaining to teammates😡
- Complaining to refs🤬
- Missing sitters🤦♂️
- Gets a lucky open net tapin⚽️
- Proceed to get 🐐 shouts
- Repeat🔁
People with REAL ball knowledge know he’s just an overrated tapin merchant 😭
What job lets you kill the most people?
An abortion doctor.
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders.
As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"
Memes
What do you call a person with no arms or legs lying face first in a river? Bob.
What do you call two people with no arms or legs standing in front of a window? Curt and Rod.
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.
"Stephen Hawking was talking about a cash register at Costco when he said I can’t stand these people. 😳😳😳😳😳😳 What did he saaaaaaayyyyyyy?"
Why are skinny people skinny?
Because he don't have a family to breastfeed on.
People in 1912: The Titanic is unsinkable!
Iceberg: Hold my beer.
Yo momma so fat that people jumped on her cuz they thought she was a school bus.
Who thinks people should stop doing orphan jokes? Type here so we can talk about it.
Tell me orphan jokes are a really bad joke. People are really orphans, and there is a lot of 'em, and they are all depressed. Who would make fun of depressed people? Well, those dumbass evil people!!
Where do depressed people go to eat?
Suicide Sonic.
Me: Hey, Mom? Why do we celebrate birthdays?
Mom: Because that's the day a new life was born, and people are born every day so every day is a special day.
My thoughts: And my friend wonders why I have depression...
I just came up with a really good deaf people joke! The great thing is that they won't be able to hear it!
My name is Mike Oxmaul, and my friend's name is Hugh Janus!
What do you call a special needs army?
The special forces.
Why do Chinese people like playing Among Us?
It’s the only place they can vote!
My Countryhumans OC, Sahara, is the daughter of France and Soviet. When people ask why, I tell them it was the gendersnapped version of my parents making me. France (my dad) was drunk and Soviet (my mom) was being horny. Then they judge me, so I judge them with a knife to the chest 47 times.