People jokes
How did two retarded people get ran over in one second?
They're my friends.
Why do people think Mozart was autistic?
Because he was probably retarded.
Black people run fast.
Scratches on an icy road and kills 50 people on the bus, and when they get to Heaven, God feels so bad for them and grants them all one wish.
The first lady in the line was always worried about her looks, so she wished to be beautiful, and the guy behind her couldn’t think of what to wish about, so he also wished to be beautiful. This kept on going, but the guy at the end of the line started to laugh. When he got to God, God says, “What is your one wish, my son?” He said, “I wish you can make them all ugly again.”
One thing about disabled people is they never set foot in prison.
Memes
The cycle of Pionel Pessi:
- Ghosting👻
- Diving🐬
- Complaining to teammates😡
- Complaining to refs🤬
- Missing sitters🤦♂️
- Gets a lucky open net tapin⚽️
- Proceed to get 🐐 shouts
- Repeat🔁
People with REAL ball knowledge know he’s just an overrated tapin merchant 😭
How do people in Alabama get circumcised? You knee your sister's jaw...
What job lets you kill the most people?
An abortion doctor.
Why do people always talk about 9/11, but seriously, just let it sit there, like the rubble it is.
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders.
As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"
Why do Chinese people like playing Among Us?
It’s the only place they can vote!
Why are skinny people skinny?
Because he don't have a family to breastfeed on.
People in 1912: The Titanic is unsinkable!
Iceberg: Hold my beer.
Yo momma so fat that people jumped on her cuz they thought she was a school bus.
"Stephen Hawking was talking about a cash register at Costco when he said I can’t stand these people. 😳😳😳😳😳😳 What did he saaaaaaayyyyyyy?"
Who thinks people should stop doing orphan jokes? Type here so we can talk about it.
Tell me orphan jokes are a really bad joke. People are really orphans, and there is a lot of 'em, and they are all depressed. Who would make fun of depressed people? Well, those dumbass evil people!!
Where do depressed people go to eat?
Suicide Sonic.
Me: Hey, Mom? Why do we celebrate birthdays?
Mom: Because that's the day a new life was born, and people are born every day so every day is a special day.
My thoughts: And my friend wonders why I have depression...
I just came up with a really good deaf people joke! The great thing is that they won't be able to hear it!