People jokes
Hello people, my name is Osama.
I'm back from the dead and I want to blow you.
You see a boat filled with people, yet there isn’t a single person on board. How is that possible?
All of them are married!
There's a plane crash. Every single person died.
Who lived? The married people!
Treon: I don't care about Vorkie.
Amber: You should, she could be a great person for the company.
Treon: We don't need another one, we got 100 people in here, no need. Now, Amber, please just go make yourself useful.
Amber: Fine!!!!!
Your Friend: Bro, I'm having a movie sleepover tonight. I've invited 17 people, wanna come?
You: Yeah, but why so many people?
Your Friend: Because the DVD says only 18+ viewers.
You: Dude!!!!
Jake?
If two people who have the clap sleep together, did they make an applause?
People generalize others too much.
Why don't people sit next to the cheetah during a test?
Because he's a cheetah!
What's the difference between you and the internet? People want a connection from the internet.
Mom, why was I adopted?
Because people are terrible, and that’s how the world works, son!
Ok, Dad, the world is TERRIBLE!
It's often said that people peaked in high school.
I think Trump peaked in kindergarten.
What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? “If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.”
Why are people born in December, January, and February easy to get along with?
They're cool and chill.
Why don’t autistic people like Autism Speaks?
They’re jealous that autism can speak.
(This is not meant to be triggering, sorry if it is).
Q. What do you get when you cross Vince Li with a bus? A. A whole lot of people who wished they'd missed the bus that day.
What do you call a group of people who are interested in Nintendo monkeys?
A Kongregation.
Did you hear about the Syrian guy that shot a bunch of people? He was Robert Kurd.
Are people still mad at Hasan from that dog incident? All he wanted to do was become the world’s first lightningbender.
Texter 1: You know People treat me like a god.
Texter 2: How?
Texter 1: They ignore my existence unless they need something.