People jokes
My aunt visited and saw all of the stuff around the house my mom had kept over the years and said, "If you have something that no one likes, and it only makes people upset, or it's useless, throw it away."
The next time my aunt visited, she said, "Where is your daughter?"
My mom said, "I took your advice."
"People are more honest when they are tired, so I made my nephew do push-ups 50 times when I realized he stole my cookies."
Yo mama so fat, she doesn't count as 1 person bro, she counts as 40 people.
Why are people that have bipolar disorder never on suicide watch?
Because they are always sucking dick.
Some of you need to go to church. I don't want you in hell with me.
Who is yourself, and why do people keep telling me to kill him?
There were people having sex when it started sinking. Legend tells when you go near the ship you can see semen, and if you listen close enough you'll hear them moaning.
Now that's a hell of a ghost story!
People are like bean burritos. You can eat them EVERY DAY, but you'll never run out.
Why do short people laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
Me (an adult) with my girl going to a nice restaurant, I asked the waiter, "People under 12 eat free, right?" The waiter confirmed that yes, people under 12 eat free, then my girlfriend said, "But I'm 13."
People say, "I like your cut G." Which is when you get a fresh cut. But I guess when you go bald, we can say, "Like your forehead, G."
I know it's really, really, really, really bad.
What do you call a group of people who are interested in Nintendo monkeys?
A Kongregation.
What's the difference between a boy and gold?
More people want gold.
The only reason gay people exist is because they couldn't get the opposite gender.
Hello ppls, I'm lilkitten ig.
People say I should be proud of my autism, but truth be told, I'm only in it for the help in class.
Why do people play soccer?
Because people need to kick harder to win a parent.
People should've recognized that Jared Fogle was a sick offender by one coded Subway sandwich; he normally claimed to kids he ate the sweet onion chicken teriyaki when it was the tuna sub.
Tuna sub was the message of the target to the kid since "tuna sub" put together makes "tunasub" and the truth comes when you spell it in reverse ("busanut")!
My brother
Some of you people on here are complete incels and need to learn how to spell and properly construct simplistic grammatical sentences that actually make sense.