Partner jokes
Who cooks in a lesbian relationship?
Neither one of them, they eat out.
I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to join my family tree... She dropped the rope and ran.
My girlfriend is like treasure to me.
You need a shovel to find her.
Why do some couples make their status "single" after a small argument? Like, I don't put "orphan" after I get into an argument with my family.
When your girlfriend tells you she's a guy: "What, bitch? Naw, hell no!"
How is sex like a game of bridge?
If you have a great hand, you don’t need a partner.
Q: What's the hardest thing about losing your virginity?
A: Making sure she doesn't wake up.
I asked a Scottish friend of mine how many sexual partners he'd had. He started counting, but fell asleep.
Why is it hard having a relationship with an astronaut?
Because they are always so distant. :-]
I always keep anti-fungal spray with me... because I don't want to share my girlfriend with anyone.
Q. What does Jeffrey Epstein get his sex partners for their birthday? A. Crayons.
I finally got a girlfriend.
Her name is Remington Model 32.
I was in a toxic relationship. After some time, my girlfriend died. Her name was Happy. Still got no clue of her body, and here I am lying on the bed so fucking happy.
When you’re trying to attract a partner, it’s important to project the qualities you desire. Shit, have I had to suck a lot of cock lately!?
I asked my lab partner for sodium hypobromate, but he said, "Na Br O."
If I don't get a partner for Christmas this year, mistletoe won't be the only thing hanging from the ceiling.
Sex is basically math. You add the bed. Subtract the clothes. Divide the legs to multiply inside.
I was always told I’m too small to ride, but every girl I’ve been with rated me a 9.5.
Who did the bee 🐝 marry?
Her honey!
Dogs are better relationship partners than you. Wanna know why? They're loyal, patient, love unconditionally, smart. Traits you clearly lack, you cheating ass bitch.