Oven

Oven Jokes

- I think you ́re EGGcellent. + Wow... You really CRACK ME UP with that joke. I think you`re a EGGxtraordinary comedian. - Really? Are you done yet?. + Are you kidding? a have a DOZEN of them.

What did Gordon Ramsay say to Hitler? “Oh my god put them back in the damn ovens! They’re so under-cooked they’re writing fucking diaries!”

Instead of the line 'This girls on fire', my friend can relate to 'The baby in the oven's on fire, and I need to take it the fuck out'

Nobody really liked our fireplace. So I turned it into a brick pizza oven. Idk why but now everyone likes our fireplace.

2 women, Jane and Emma, are in the afterlife waiting for judgement. Emma turns to Jane and says "I'm just curious, but how did you die?"

Jane replies with "I burnt to death."

Emma, shocked, responds with "That sounds horrible! What was it like?"

Jane answers with "It first felt really hot and painful, but then I felt nothing. How did you die?"r> Emma replies with "Well, I believed my husband was cheating on me. I decided to leave work early one day to make sure he was loyal. I found him on the phone with his mother. I thought he was hiding something from me so I ran to the bedroom and found nothing. Then I sprinted to the kitchen and didn't find anything. I then jolted outside to the backyard and just found that he hadn't cleaned the pool. I was so tired from running that I fell over into the pool and drowned."

Jane retorts with "Well if you checked the oven neither of us would be here right now."