What do you call Dominos when it doesn't knows to cook Pizza?
Domi-don't-knows....
Little Johnny was in kindergarten and his teacher said, "okay everyone, Tomorrow you must come to school and recite the first three letters of the alphabet". Johnny didn't know the alphabet so he decided to ask his family. He walked in the kitchen to find his mom on the phone. He says, "Mamma, what's the first letter of the alphabet?" His mom doesn't notice him standing there and says, "If you don't shut the fuck up right now-" So he goes to find his brother watching TV and he says, "Tommy what's the Second letter of the alphabet?" His brother doesn't notice him and says, "I'm Batman". So He went to his Grandma who was knitting and says, "Grandma what's the third letter of the Alphabet?" The grandma then realizes she left her biscuits in the oven for too long and says, "My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!" Satisfied with the answers given to him he thinks it over and goes to school the next morning. When his teacher come to Johnny she says, "Johnny what are the first three letters of the alphabet?" "If you don't shut the fuck up right now" - Johnny "Who do you think you are young man to talk to someone like me that way?" - teacher "I'm Batman" - Johnny The teacher whups his ass and little johnny says, "My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!"
Later that day he understands what happened and can't tell which was worse that he accidentally cussed to his teacher or that his family was ignoring him.
What is a oven that you don’t own : nacho oven
Why was a oven so smart. It had 70 degrees
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
I don't get why bakers aren't wealthier. They make so much dough.
What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? "I want you inside me."
I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person. So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.
Why did Hitler's cookies taste bad? He forgot to clean out the oven.
I want to be like pizza so i can get cut into 8 pieces
There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma'm and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?
These jokes are EGGxactly why I became a comedian and I know how to BAKEon breakfast
2 jokes in a row babyyyyy
How do you make Alabama cookies? Put them in a big bowl and beat for three hours.
Why can't Orphans bake? The don't have milk
When you put the chicken in the oven and it goes down and the oven explodes oven and smoke and everything is fire and on fire and flies to the grass and all goes back
What is the best way to make a leaf. Go down back around and stir up a tree. Make it spin watch again. Oven baking ding we're done!
Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap
What did the rapper say to his microwave?
"Yo, HEAT IT UP, fam"
One of my earliest memories is seeing my mother's face through the oven window. As we played hide and seek and she said: "You're getting warmer!".
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
Because he wanted to make DOUGH from his BEATS
