One jokes
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
What's the difference between a blonde and the Panama Canal?
One's a busy ditch.
One day I threw a boomerang...
Now I live in constant fear.
Why do orphans not care about sleep? Because they have no one to wake up to.
Yeah man! Life is wonderful! But, when you realize all of the ones you loved were fake.
And when you die, does your online friends notice? How will they notice? Or will they ever notice? Is 13 age too young for dying? Am I just paranoid? I'm scared.
Memes
Whatβs the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.
Q: What did one gay cowboy say to the other gay cowboy?
A: Hayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
The guard caught one of the fugitives as he tried to escape. All he said was...
"Don't let your guard down."
I like my girlfriend's new secondary school uniform, I guess, but doesnβt beat her old primary school one. π
Orphans are like vegans, no one ever remembers the nice ones.
I have a better method of abortion than currently used. It's like a regular one, except you can get free food out of it... We're about to give baby-back ribs a whole new meaning.
My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."
Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"
"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."
What's the difference between the milkman and my dad?
Nothing, they are both one thing except he never returns with milk.
(I've been eating cereal with water COMBINATION!)
My mother-in-law would have been on one of the planes that crashed on 9/11.
Had I known in advance, I would have bought her the ticket.
I had a broken vacuum, then I put a One Direction sticker on it and it suddenly sucked again.
Yo mama so fat, when she made a joke, only one person laughed at it: the pavement. It was absolutely cracking up!
Is it possible for an orphan to go on an away trip?
No, because they already are on one.
Why are friends good at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.
It's sad someone has ligma.
Why do animators like Christianity?
Because Jesus was the one who invented T-Pose.