One jokes

There is only one reason why I find women useful.

That is because they make sandwiches, but that is about it.

I just donated $100 to a blind children's charity, suck that no one will see it.

I need a new butt. This one has a hole in it.

I love to have sex. And my name is Lex. Which one should I be with next? I really hate my ex. I just saw a huge T Rex, And I think you probably saw this text.

Welcome for the rhyme.

What do you call a one-legged hippo?

A hoppo!

Okay, One time I there was my dog. But then the dog, it fell.

Then I f**ked my dog hard in the a**.

Person one: What did the DJ name his son?

Person two: IDK, what?

Person one: Erik (while making a DJ motion).

Seven days without a pun makes one weak.

What comes next in the pattern, ottffs?

S, because it represents numbers going up: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.

What did one plane say to the other?

"It’s been a long day, I’m ready to crash."

Other plane: "No you’re not, we haven’t even gotten high yet!"

One day, I sit in the lounge on a chair.

What's worse than 2 dead babies in a trash bin? Two babies in one trash bin.

Q: Why doesn’t Toledo have a professional football team?

A: Because then, Cincinnati would want one.

A man walked into a zoo and there was only one dog.

He came out and said, "It was a shitzu."

If your parents ever accuse you of lying... Say, "You're the one who told me about Santa Claus!"

Bully: My d*ck is longer than your password.

Me: Sorry mate, it's so short, get a longer one! 🤣

Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.

Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.

Why can orphans get away with robbing the bank?

Because no one wants him.

When you're at school and you have to wipe your ass, but it's only one ply...

Your finger breaks through... mmm, finger lickin' good.

Why did the priest buy a clown suit?

Because the old one had blood all over it.