One jokes

How can Canada be one of the most educated countries when Canadians are unable to correctly spell "analyse", "programme", and "aluminium"?

One day a man buys a rope to commit suicide, but his friend stops him.

They go to a school with lots of happy kids. The guy feels better after a mag.

Friend: Name one gay person off the top of your head.

Me: Me.

What's an orphan's favorite meme?

Homer going into a bush.

Might take a while to notice and this one is bad.

What did the green grape say to the purple one?

"Calm down and take a breath."

It's just been discovered that as well as writing a book, Adolf Hitler also wrote one of the first computer games, "Mein Kraft."

So this dude comes home from work one day, and his wife is watching the Food Network.

The husband asks, "Why do you watch that? You still can't cook," and the wife responds, "Why do you watch porn? You still can't f*ck."

How many Kardashians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One really small one and one really small black guy.

This joke's about flowers, the blue one's a violet.

Your mom's the Twin Towers and I am the pilot!

What was the African kid with water called...? The lucky one. 😭😭

Your sister is your mother.

Your father is your brother.

You all shag one another.

The Inbred family.

A guy wakes up one morning and is walking down the road, and he smells fish, and he says, "Good morning, ladies!"

Battery 1%.

I take one last look at Earth as my suit runs out of power.

Why do orphans never get a car?

Because their parents need to buy them one.

Sorry but, no one asked.

One of my family members died on 9/11, he was one of the best pilots in the Middle East.

How many orphans can you fit in a bag of chips?

One, if the bag is family size.

You go up to a bar and say, "Hi." He doesn’t look at you. You keep saying, "Hi." He says, "What?" Then you realize that he is the one that you stole his lady from, but then he doesn’t give you any drink. You say, "Why?" He screams at you and then says, "YOU'RE FIVE!"

Stephen Hawking: one hp (Fortnite)

I tried to eat ass once. The donkeys got one hell of a kick!