One jokes

How can Canada be one of the most educated countries when Canadians are unable to correctly spell "analyse", "programme", and "aluminium"?

It's just been discovered that as well as writing a book, Adolf Hitler also wrote one of the first computer games, "Mein Kraft."

What was the African kid with water called...? The lucky one. 😭😭

A guy wakes up one morning and is walking down the road, and he smells fish, and he says, "Good morning, ladies!"

Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh, how did I survive?

Fortunately, being her husband, I was the one person she wasn't fucking.

One of my family members died on 9/11, he was one of the best pilots in the Middle East.

Your sister is your mother.

Your father is your brother.

You all shag one another.

The Inbred family.

What did one butt cheek say to the other?

"Together we can stop this shit."

What’s a lung’s favorite type of exercise?

Breathing exercises.

I told this to my English teacher, and he said it to the class, and no one laughed. Someone help!

One of my students asks, "Can I have a bookmark?"

A year of school and they still don't know my name is Danny.

Teachers: Whenever there’s a school shooting, hide under the desk.

Students: Hiding under desk.

Shooter: Well, no one’s in here!

What is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? One sticks to the roof of your mouth, while the other one doesn't!

One day I met a blind guy and I said, "You should see Mt. Cheaha!"

What did one God say to the other?

"I will die to be a man."

Me: I will f**k ur mom.

Orphan: I don't have one.

Me: ......

Why do orphans never get a car?

Because their parents need to buy them one.

Sorry but, no one asked.

Battery 1%.

I take one last look at Earth as my suit runs out of power.

Bro, I’m so pissed. There is always that one kid in the class who the teacher helps. I hate that guy in the wheelchair.

How many orphans does it take to repair a house? None, they don't have one.