One jokes
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One is for Sunday morning, and one is for Sunday night.
What did Jesus say when he was left hanging on the cross?
"Well this is one hell of a way to spend my Easter vacation!"
I was watching TV with my brother, and a diabetes commercial came on saying, "I have type one diabetes, and I manage it well."
My brother said, "You want a cookie?"
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One serves the nailed to the cross, one nailed by her boss.
Friend: Name one gay person off the top of your head.
Me: Me.
There are only 2 genders
This joke's about flowers, the blue one's a violet.
Your mom's the Twin Towers and I am the pilot!
How many Kardashians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One really small one and one really small black guy.
Why can't Columbus be offered a professional football team?
Because then Cincinnati would want one too.
I knew this one guy who liked to swim with the fishes, then the mob got a hold of 'em...
One day, I put a lady taffy on my ass.
There was a guy called Manners, one called Poo, and one called Shut Up.
One day, Manners was on his way to pick up Poo from school. A police officer stopped Shut Up and said:
Police: "What’s you name?"
Shut Up: "Shut Up."
Police: "Where's your manners?!"
Shut Up: "Picking up Poo."
Sara's Mom was helping her prepare for her driver's test.
Mom: "Okay, any questions?"
Sara: "Yes. I actually don't know what "yield" means."
Mom: "Don't worry, Hon. No one does."
The one thing I love about Steven is he stood up for all of his haters. Just kidding!
What did one skeleton say to the other?
Skeleton 1: "I need a hand!"
Skeleton 2: (Throws up hand)
Skeleton 1: "That wasn't very humerus."
Skeleton 2: "Why do you have to be so heartless?"
Skeleton 1: "At least I had the guts to tell you!"
Why didn't the newest Star Wars movie start with the classic scrawl?
Because it was a Rogue One!
What did one male whale say to the other male whale?
"She's gonna blow!"
What did one snow ❄️ man say to itself? My arm is broken.
What's an orphan's favorite meme?
Homer going into a bush.
Might take a while to notice and this one is bad.
What did the green grape say to the purple one?
"Calm down and take a breath."
"Did you hear about the worst zoo in the world? It only had one dog in it. It was a Shih Tzu."