One jokes

A momma cow and three baby calves are on a farm. The first baby calf asks the momma cow, "Mom, why is my name Rose?"

The mom responded, "Well, you see, when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head."

The second one asks her, "Then why is my name Daisy?"

The mom chuckled and simply replied with, "When you were born, Daisy petals fell on your head."

The last one said, "DUH DUR SURH!"

The mom said, "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!"

Why were the Twin Towers knocked over? Chuck Norris was leaning on one of them.

Teacher: Okay class, look at the person to the right of you and describe them with one word.

Me: *looks to the right of me and sees the pick-me girl* "Penny."

Teacher: *shocked* How is she a penny?

Me: 'Cause she's two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants. Not to mention worth practically nothing.

How can Canada be one of the most educated countries when Canadians are unable to correctly spell "analyse", "programme", and "aluminium"?

Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh, how did I survive?

Fortunately, being her husband, I was the one person she wasn't fucking.

I, for one, give President Joe Biden my full support, and anything else he can find in my previously rented gym locker. 🤣

I tried to eat ass once. The donkeys got one hell of a kick!

Stephen Hawking: one hp (Fortnite)

I went to the mental hospital. I asked one of the kid what its favorite animal was. They said a bird. I asked for a reason. It's because they both jump off roofs.

Why can't Heaven and Hell ever be one 2nd paradise?

Heaven always has 5-star reviews.

What show do gay men watch?

"2 and a Half Men!"

Lol at this one fellas!

What did one chair say to the other?

"I'm so bummed out!"

One of my family members died on 9/11, he was one of the best pilots in the Middle East.

Why do orphans never get a car?

Because their parents need to buy them one.

Battery 1%.

I take one last look at Earth as my suit runs out of power.

What was the African kid with water called...? The lucky one. 😭😭

A guy wakes up one morning and is walking down the road, and he smells fish, and he says, "Good morning, ladies!"

Bro, I’m so pissed. There is always that one kid in the class who the teacher helps. I hate that guy in the wheelchair.

Sorry but, no one asked.

Me: I will f**k ur mom.

Orphan: I don't have one.

Me: ......