Old jokes

You look too old to be living with your grandma.

Is your hairline and forehead old friends, because they go wayyyy back?

You're walking one day and a little kid, about 5-6 years old, comes up to you asking, "What's a condom?" You have to give that child the wrong answer, what would you tell them? Comment on what you would tell them.

What do 7 year old girls want?

To be ate!

How old do you have to be to drink? Any age.

Have you heard about kids with AIDS?

It never gets old.

What is tall when it's young but short when it's old?

A candle or a pencil!

POV: You are 7 years old and you find a stick. SWORD.

My 1 year old nephew had a stroke. I know, sounds bad... but he would have needed to learn how to speak and walk anyways.

Your mom is so old that her birth certificate says "expired."

What do you call it if you find an old organ keyboard on the side of the road?

Organ harvesting.

I was digging outside and I found my child's old toy, so I ran to find him, but I could not find him, so I was searching for about 6 hours, but then I remembered why I was digging......

Q. What do filicide jokes and filicide victims have in common?

A. They never get old.

Any 8 year old: Sus!

Me: Jake, we're at a funeral!

What do a 100-year-old pornstar and The White Stripes have in common? Icky Thump!

Why would the chicken not cross the road?

Because it's too old. (The joke is old.) (The chicken is old.)

1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!

What's the natural cure to an old man's inability to forgive people?

Alzheimer's.

At one point in your life, you were exactly pi years old.

I just prevented an 11-year-old from getting assaulted.

I decided to go home.