Object jokes
Yo dad is like a boomerang; he never comes back.
What kind of paper gets stuck to your foot?
DUH! A sticker.
Why are lamps so scared? Because someone might throw them away.
Where is the pocket?
It is there, the pocket.
What’s the similarity between a penis and a lollipop?
Kids can take both.
Memes
What falls and never gets hurt? Rain ☔
What did one pillow say to the other?
Nothing, meh, they just sang a song about a rogue chicken whose feathers had been sacrificed to make them.
Are you a rope? Cause I'm tryna put you around my neck 😏
Yo mama so fat that she broke the chair by sitting on it.
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a hairdryer.
Student: There are 505 rocks in a car. If 8 fall out, how many are left?
Teacher: There will be 497 rocks left.
Student: Ok!!
Student: How do you put an alligator in a closet?
Teacher: You can't, it won't fit.
Student: No!! Just open the door, put the alligator in, then close the door.
Teacher: Ohhh, now I get it.
What's the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls?
You can only unload one of them with a pitch fork.
How are babies and watermelons similar?
They are both fun to smash open with a sledgehammer and eat the insides.
My grandpa asked me to pass him his phone, but I passed him a calculator. He couldn't tell the difference.
"Knife to meet ya."
What gets louder as it gets smaller?
A baby in a blender.
Are you a razor? 'Cause you make me red.
What's the difference between an umbrella and a tree?
I don't know.
I have a match!
My ass, your face.
What’s the difference between a boomerang and an orphan's parents?
One of the two actually came back.😂