Numbers jokes

Poopoo

    • Tell someone that you're gonna say “I 1 poopoo” and it will go in order of numbers, so they say, “I 2 poopoo” & so on:

    You) I 1 poopoo

    (Them) I 2 poopoo

    (You) I 3 poopoo

    (Them) I 4 poopoo

    (You) I 5 poopoo

    (Them) I 6 poopoo

    (You) I 7 poopoo

    (Them) I 8 poopoo

    And be like, “You ate poopoo??! EWW!!”

  • 2

    • Bus Driver

    • A guy on a bus saw a beautiful girl. He asked for her number, and of course, she said no. He asked the bus driver for advice, and he said, "That girl goes to the cemetery to pray every day at 10 p.m. and look for a statue of an angel." So he dresses up as God, goes to the grave, and she sees him. She says, "Oh, Lord, end my misery! Kill me now!" And he said, "Only if you do something for me first." She replied, "What is it, oh mighty Lord?" He said, "Have sex with me." She agreed. They had sex, and when she was done sucking his dick, he said, "I have something to tell you." He took off his costume and said, "I'm the guy from the bus." And she took off her costume: "I'm the bus driver."

    (Does anyone remember this? It's an old joke someone made, or does no one remember this? I didn't make this, but it went smth like this)

  • 1
    • Numbers memes

    Orphan

    • An orphan entered the high school for the first time. He has no knowledge of the school. He went to the secretary and asked where he shall go. The secretary then gave the orphan a schedule and said to the orphan, “Where is homeroom?” The secretary then asked which homeroom number he was assigned, and he said "1." The orphan then started to weep and said that his parents died right as he stole his first base in baseball.

  • 1

    • Volcano

    • Did you hear about the volcano that was accepted into Cambridge?

    It was a decision on the number of degrees it holds, which is a lot, because volcanoes have lava if they're active. And ours was.

    Woman

    • The woman became extremely uncomfortable with the man she had just met. While he lay beside her, romantically kissing and stroking her neck he whispered, “I called the number you gave me at the bar tonight. Someone named Alvin answered who has never heard of you.”

  • 4

    • Pen

    • I was in a bar in Italy. Me and a hot chick got along, so I asked her for her number. I remembered that there was a pen in my pocket, but when I searched, it was nowhere to be found. I turned back, then I saw Pessi running with it. Shame on you, Pessi, for ruining my night! 😭

  • 1

    • Wife

    • Me: A lot of things changed since I got my wife pregnant.

    Friend: Like what?

    Me: My name, my address, my phone number...

    Dick

    • Best thing ever right here.

    So, there is this app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12-15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12-15 inches longer.