Numbers jokes
Your hairline is so long that when you finally found the length of it, you told someone and they said, "Don't give me your phone number."
It was pornography class, and there was a break.
Two adults were "having a good time" till the teacher says...
Teacher: Hey! SAY ALL THE NUMBERS TO 10,000 NOW!
Adult 1: How about I say my ABC's?
Teacher: Go ahead, I guess...
Adult 1: A B C E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Teacher: Where's the D?
Adult 2: Inside me...
Me, calls the police*
Me: Hey, I'm gonna commit suicide!
Cop on the phone: Please wait till we get there.
Me: Why, so you can then stop me?
Cop on the phone: No, we just want a murder, not a suicidal report on your paper... and we are all bored!
Me: Ok, my house number is *********************, ok!
Cop on the phone: Awesome! Just a sec. *whispers* Guys, I finally found someone who wants to get killed!
I guess age is just a number, but in your boyfriend's case, a personal preference.
What did the Nazi order from Wendy's?
Two number NEINs.
There are 50 dogs and 48 cats.
How many are hungry?
A. 10
What number is better; 46 or 47?
I don't know, ask the kid with Down syndrome.
Me: A lot of things changed since I got my wife pregnant.
Friend: Like what?
Me: My name, my address, my phone number...
What's the emergency number, Jimmy?
Jimmy: 9/11!
Bobby had 54 dicks (54).
He took 33 pills a month (5433).
Once he ran out of pills, he was left with 45 dicks (543345).
(Flip the calculator once you got the full number. 543345! He's got a lot!
An Asian student was learning logarithm in class. He wrote down his name after the question. The teacher asked why. He replied, "My class ID is number 1."
A missionary went to visit an orphanage in Thailand. After looking around, he asked the manager, "Why do these kids have numbers instead of names on their shirts? And why are some of them the same?"
The manager smiled and said, "Those are price tags."
Learn math the easiest way from Pendu.
Multiplying any number by 0 is 0 itself.
Hint: Multiplying any number by Pendu's G/A in 2022 is 0 itself.
The answer is 0.
What's tree plus tree? Sticks! (Three plus three equals six).
I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!
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I harvested indigo to make dye. I made the dye. I made a number dye. I dyed the dye. I rolled the dye. It made me die.
They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.
Been learning Chinese...
69 is too-can-chew.
Roses are red, violets are fine, you'll be the 6 and I'll be the 9.
I like my clocks like I like people.
Under 12.