Worst Jokes Ever
Why can’t orphans live?
They don’t have parents.
Why do you have to watch your back at NASA? They want to probe Uranus.
I heard an Uber from your eyebrows to your hairline is like $40.
What do a school shooter and a person with gum have in common?
One's the pull it out everyone wants to be their friend.
My sis said only garlic and onions can make you cry.
So I threw an orange at her.
So I went to a mall and I was finna buy something... and I saw a little boy and he said "hello," so then I passed by him and he said "hi," and I was like "hi nigga," and he said, "um, just wondering something... I mean I like jokes, but what is dark humor?" And I was like "umm🤔.. it's like 🤔🤔...like you see that guy without legs? Tell him to stand up"... and he said "I'm blind nigga" and I said "exactly homie"... aight nigga peace and look out😏😉
What do you call Mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan.
My humour is so dark that its life matters.
Wife: "Hi honey, I'm pregnant."
Husband: "Hi pregnant, I'm dad."
Wife: "No, you're not...."
My girlfriend accused me of cheating, and I said to her, "You're starting to sound like my wife."
My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex between 1-10.
Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting "9"!
That’s the best I’ve done so far.
Teacher: I used to be an orphan once.
Student: OOFT.
Teacher: Who are we missing?
Student: Your parents.
Why are chickens so awesome? Because... Chicken noise.
Remember that you're unique, just like everyone else.
Best part about being an orphan?
Not spending 1h30 at the table every night with your dad yelling, "What's 2*3?!!" And you crying, "I don't know!!!"
You wanna hear a suicide joke? Nvm, it didn't make it.
How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
More than five because my basement is still dark.
Dyslexic man walks into a bra.
Why can orphans not go on field trips? They need a parent signature.
If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.